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It All Adds Up...

I've never trusted people easily. Infact in can take years before I even give a person a chance. I think it all comes with the life I've had. Everyone in my life has betrayed me or let me down or just hurt me severely my whole life. My mom is a master manipulator...you can't trust her. You have to watch everything you say and do and pay close attention to everything she is saying and doing. My dad was never around when I was little...I don't know if that was by his choice or my mom's...I don't think she ever told me the truth about him one time...so I don't know if she kept me from him or if he made the choice not to be around. My family is full of back stabbers and liers. I mean don't get me wrong...they are generally good people you just have to watch yourself around them. They are the type where they will use anything they can against you...so you have to be careful about everything you do and say...or they will make you feel like crap for the rest of your life. Not only that but they will spend their time convincing you your no good...in their own...suttle...way. Then there are the men my mom brought into my life. Man she can really pick them. She stayed with this one guy for 15 years. He was unreal...you had to protect yourself from him all the time. He was a bully, a jerk, a liar, a cheater...you name it this man did it. Maybe my problem is I haven't had a lot of people around that I could trust so I don't really know how to. It takes everything I have to let someone get close to me...and even then I keep them at a certain distance as well. There are people I trust...but there's only one person that I trust completely and she's sick so I'm not able to talk to her much. I have people I know I can turn to and count on...but I just don't know how to let them in ya know...I don't know how to trust them completely.  I keep everyone at a distance...I just have to.
pepsi21addict pepsi21addict 21-25, F 1 Response Mar 24, 2007

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Your background sounds like you were writing my bio, except the part about "basically good people? and my mom married the jerk! I have trust issues as well.