I am 25 and have 3 children under 6. I have been with my husband since I was 14, married at 18, and started a family a few months into the marriage. I love my kids with all my heart and wouldn't give them up for anything. I am now to the point where I just don't want to be married anymore. I did tell him a couple of years ago that I wanted to leave and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It took me a long time to come up with the courage to say it. I lost my nerve to leave when I saw how upset he was. My problem is that I don't have the heart to watch him hurt, but I also am sick of this life. I don't work. I have the kids all the time, no close friends or family, no way of getting out of the house..I feel stuck. I feel like since I told him I wanted to leave the first time, things have gotten a little worse. He does work hard to provide for us, but I feel like I have to tiptoe around to not make him mad. He gets jealous over everything and finds reasons for me not to do things. I feel like he is trying to keep me at home so that I won't meet anyone else. The thing is..I feel like he's treating the kids the same way. They are missing out on things, like playing with kids next door. I think that is because there is a guy my age living there and "he doesn't want him near me". Exact words. I am also afraid to tell him again because I don't know how he'll react and I do have kids mixed in it. How do I do it? I don't have a car or money and my kids need to go to school. My closest relative is not in the school district and I hate to make them transfer schools again. Any advice or anything?
Mom1989 Mom1989
26-30, F
1 Response Aug 31, 2014

get out while you can and are still young, maybe secretively look for a place and a job if he is that restricting and didn't try to make things better but apparently made it worse when you first told him... just get out of it. It sounds like he's trying to own you.

I have been looking for work. My problem is not having a way to get there. I feel like my entire youth is slipping away. I am always afraid I'm doing something wrong that will make him mad. I even turned off my FB because it irritated him. He works hard, a great dad, and we have good times. I still care a lot about him, but it just isn't the same. I know it sounds stupid, but I even feel like I'm doing something wrong if I just think about things that might make him mad. I'm just frustrated and tired of it all. Not only am I home all the time with no social interaction, but he never wants to go out and do things anymore either. Again, it effects the girls too. I'm too young to let my life pass me by.

yes, you are.