I Do Not Want to Become My Parents

I'll spare you much drama.  I do not want to become my parents, although sometimes I feel I am headed in that direction. 

My Mother is passive aggressive and sort of lives in her own world.  She hardly ever leaves the house but to go to her part time job at a grocery store down the road.  She is obsessed-- and I mean obsessed-- with TV.  I don't understand her sometimes.

Dad was always very emotionally neglectful with us.  Almost all his life, he would just hang out in his den by himself smoking and watching TV.  He never came out that much.  He showed love mainly thru money.  He did not leave the house that much either. He was also very hard to talk too, as he didn't get what you were saying half the time and took everything personally.  But, I still love him and really miss him sometimes.

I come from a VERY dysfuntional family and try to live opposite of that.  I did have a nice childhood with my family, but at times, it was really hard.

Now that I have a son, I do NOT want to repeat those mistakes.  I learned alot from my parents. In many different ways...some good and some bad.  There was more good, though.  And I wish to pass that part onto my son.  But, I will never let my son feel unloved or not good enuff.  Because my son rules.  And I let him know that everyday.  No matter if he has autism or not, he should never feel there is something wrong with him.  He's my miracle and reason for living.  He's very special indeed and you would fall in love with him if you met him.  Very sweet.

haydenrules haydenrules
31-35, F
Feb 13, 2009