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I've Come Too Far To Give Up Now...

I've worked so hard to stop. For the most part I do pretty well. I can go months at a time without doing it, but when things get bad and start to seem like they are getting out of control I can't help it. It's the first thing I reach for. It's the only thing I want. It seems like it is the only thing that can fix it.
It's been over a month since I've done it last, but things are starting to feel like they are falling apart in my life and there's nothing that I can do to control it. I'm doing my very best not to give in, but the thoughts and urges are there. I don't want to give in anymore. I don't want my ability to hold myself together to depend on a blade. I want to be able to deal with things in a better way...
twitchy09 twitchy09 18-21, F Aug 28, 2013

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