With Or Without You

well never be and why is that something i can never see i cant bring my self to stop loveing and careing for him ive pushed somemany people out ov my life and yet i cant him im madly in love with him and and hell never understand hel never get that i cant get over him hell never see how much pain he puts me through everyday ? i wanna runaway everyday , i wanna forget everything , everyone i wanna block out tha world and live careless and free but, i dont wanna hurt anybody in my way its confuseing and i dont undestand how you can be with somebody so long and tell them so much and be with them almost everynight spending all your time togather giveing your all and not miss them and not long for ther touch or need to hear ther voice its getting harder and harder everyday for me to even act lik im okay eveyone can say and say and say they understand but truth is you neevr will NOONE understands how jux the way he would look at me made me feel Jux absoultly BEAUITFUL no one nose that i did everythang he ever asxed me to do cause i thought itd make hime stay. Everytime he said iLove You it took a peace ov my heart cause i had to thank is he lieing or mybe this time could it be true no one gets that i LOVED him so much that i`d do ANYTHANG to jux redo it all of it noing that i`d be hurt in the end noing that hed chose her i do it just to have that time spent with him back ? with every touch he gave me to everythang hes took from me i never needed something so bad hes my addiction that i can never fight off i need him and yet i cant have him . every time i think im over him i have dreams and they seem soo real and i hate to wake up noing it`ll never be he never loved me at all but i was stoopid and i believed he did i realy did everytime and everytime i took him back i was only hurting myself its lik they say first time its on them secound time its you i went somemany times thanking something would change but , at the end she got the guy the one i was trying to change the one i was trying to keep she got him and i got nothing ?
the one who new i was with him and still would sleep with him and it sucks cause i could never be that girl too never could i bring myself to be the other girl never will i put myself that low i love him but i also love and respect myself to much ?
without him i dont think the sun ever going to shine as bright without him i dont think il ever sleep the same without him those rainey days will never be the same . i look back and i can remember everythang but il never understand why.. why he chose me.. why he kept me around so long ...il never get it ?