Young Lad Beaten To Death With Plastic Fly Swat By Ma Baker.

That is how i imagined the headlines would read.
Ma Baker was my mum, or at least that's what i personally named her. We clashed like crazy and she so irritated me by her ways. We would scrap with each other in that non touch mother son way. The cutting words aimed back and forth with such matriarchal malice and hormone fueled teenager angst. On a bad day id push her too far and she would attack me enraged out of her Coronation street mind, spitting blood, a fly swat in hand, swishing at any part of me that took away the rage she possessed. 
I covered my face and screamed to the gods for any supernatural intervention on my behalf.  When she stopped to gather her mental stability,  id laugh in her face and maybe say  'nya ha stupid dingbat'  as i sat in the comphy tv recliner chair bought on special at Farmers. This infused radioactive white vinegar back into her bloodstream in less than a second and she would let rip another merciless lashing. 
lafsnack lafsnack
51-55, M
Dec 3, 2012