Old Men Turn Me On

I am 46 years old. For years I have had this fantasy about having sex with an old man. I get extremely wet and turned on just thinking about it. I always wondered where tthese thoughts came from because when I would see an old man and think those thoughts, I didn't think I could actually go through with it. One day about four years ago my fantasy got the better of me. I was caught up in my fantasy. My panties were wet. I decided to go out braless and see if I really wanted to make this fantasy a reality. I met this old man, 78, in a grocery store parking lot. I walked in front of him braless pretending to get something out of my trunk. He kept looking at me. I kept looking back at him to show my interest. He started talking to me, mentioning my **** and how he would like to get his tongue on them. So we drove down to a secluded area in the woods where he fondled, sucked, and played with my **** for a long time. He was old and could not get a full erection and that was the only thing that stopped us from having sex, though we tried several times. He would call me several times a week to meet him so he could fondle and suck my nipples, and still calls me. I love it!! Sometimes I think I'm "sick" to be doing such and I don't understand why I desire such?? I enjoy it as much today as I did in the beginning.