Sometimes It Happens...

Friendship is very important to me. I treasure all of my friends for different reasons because they are all special in their own ways. However, sometimes in life you meet someone who claims to be your friend and all the while there is some underlying motive, some untruth, deceit, and eventually betrayal. Betrayal comes in many forms. Breaking a way from a friendship that evetually becomes negative and hurtful is the right thing to do for me.  I am not always happy about it,  especially when it ends in a negative fashion. I feel that isn’t really necessary. I can walk away from a friend that has caused me hurt/grief and not inflict the same on them. Why is that necessary in the grand scheme of things?  It isn’t. They weren’t really your friend to begin with.  I don’t believe you have to tear someone apart or break them before walking away.
Maybe a manual on how to be a friend would be a great thing! The quality of what we all expect in friendship should be high for all of us. Being a friend is being there, being supportive, challenging you at times when you need it but at the end of the day providing each other with unconditional love and support.  Recently, I have lost a friend because of reasons I will not mention in this story however suffice it to say this person had their best interest at heart, not mine and they chose a path that resulted in the consequence of this friendship being destroyed. If you don’t care for me then just go and I will do the same.
Friendships come and go and I am ok with that. 
snowbunny1002 snowbunny1002
46-50, F
19 Responses Jul 6, 2010

No regrets is the best way to live. I happen to believe that friendships like relationships do require work and effort. It's when that effort becomes all encompassing that there needs to be a change.

You have such a way with words Bassy :)..and as usual I totally agree!! XOXOX

Troutguy- thanks so much for your comments :) . I haven't looked at this story in a awhile but at the time was extremely painful to write. As time as moved on so have I and it was definitely the right decision. No regrets :)

redpen- I have nothing against payback if that's your thing. But for me personally I think the guilt they have to live with is enough. My piece of mind is is ok knowing that the people I love and care for know the situation and are aware of why the decision to end the friendship 'was necessary. <br />
<br />
I am not saying payback isn't a good thing in some situations but in general removing the person from my life and knowing they have to live with what they have done is enough. <br />
Thanks so much for your comments :)

Bassy- as always you nailed it! <br />
<br />
EricS- you know Bassy :)

Eloquent in its brevity, Bassy. =)

Pains sucks. Just sayin....

kazen- lol- you're right, it sure does!! :)<br />
<br />
vitadisgrazia- I am so sorry for your pain. Your situation seems a little different than what I was trying to convey in this story. The person I am referring to purposely and intentionally did many things to hurt me even though they portrayed themselves to be a friend who loved & cared for me. When you intentionally cause pain and hurt for someone that really is someone that doesn't need to be in your life.

I lost my best friend of over 15 years last week because she died unexpectedly, i guess it was totally unexpected as it would be the normal outcome of her new found lifestyle, Without giving gorey details I had shut her out of my life since her choice to do select activities had already stolen her from me... now she is gone forever and i am left with a hole in my heart that aches and will never be fixed.

Sometimes **** happens

Destiney24- I know what you mean. It's hard when you give from the heart and that trust is shattered! Lots of luck to you in your healing :)

Ok for the women that read this yes a guy that is friends with a girl will ALWAYS hope it will turn into something more.

Angelwings- I can't tell you how true those words are. :) XOXXO <br />
<br />
Pix- Thanks! It's true u cant surround yourself with people who only claim to be your friend but in essense do alot to undermine you and other relationships in your life. It's a hard lesson to learn but one that is worth it in the end. You can be true to yourself and those friends that stick with you regardless of choices are your true friends. You have to let the negative go and move on :) <br />
<br />
Hugs to you!!

Deanze- you are exactly right :)...its always a good thing to treat others as you want to be treated !

ANightWriter- It's unfortunate but its true :(

des- thanks so much :) hugs to you too !<br />
<br />
mtvlm- I expect friends that don't lie and deceive me or others I care for so this one perhaps was easier to walk away from in order to avoid any more pain that was unduly caused. You are right, you want to surround yourself with people that have your best interest at heart, not ones out to destroy you.

Sad to see any real friendship die for various reasons. But sometimes it is better to have those that are traveling more along your line than having others that don't. (((((HUGS)))))


Thanks Fungirl. I do feel a renewed sense of self and a renewed sense of love and caring from those that I do consider real and true friends. There were several blessings that have come out of all of this as you well know. Thanks for the compliment and comment :) OXOXO

Awwww Snowy. I am so sorry you were hurt by this person but I also know that it has strengthened your resolve in the persons that you consider your closest friends and I have seen a renewal in you that I never thought I would see. You are even more loving and caring than you were in the past and that was a blessing coming out of this. ((hugs))