Happy To Be Alone, Sad To Be Lonely

This is a weird concept to accept, even for me. I was always alone growing up, playing by myself, and always the loner in highschool (more like the wallflower). However, now I am 22, and live with my girlfriend while going to grad school. Now that I constantly have someone around me (my girlfriend) I enjoy my time alone. But while I enjoy being alone, I also yearn for someone to talk to. It is a never ending cycle where I want to be alone, but then I am around people, but then want to be alone again. I think for me, it is that being alone is a comfortable feeling and takes me back to when I was younger, when I felt safe.
RedSkittle RedSkittle
4 Responses Jul 12, 2010

I feel the same like you. If I am around people too much and do not have time to be alone, I will feel something is missing, and I can be cranky (hahaha). However after few hours being alone, then I will start to find anyone to talk to. Weird.<br />
So I would say as long as you have friends/girlfriend who gives you space, but also gives you the love you need, it will be perfect.

Just food for thought. What does being alone mean to you? As I meditate on your experiences, I think you are very fortunate. There is an old saying, "when God wants to deal with you, he gets you alone".<br />
Look at the things you do when you're alone. Do they add or detract from making you a better person? Being alone is a time to focus on you and your world. A time to be more productive at pursuing your interests and goals. Maybe, when you're around other people, your desire to be alone surfaces because those people don't represent any of the things that make you, YOU. Or maybe being around other people is an escape from dealing with yourself, to really developing yourself spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and professionally. Maybe God wants you to be alone so you can develop and to become accountable for the work he wants you to do. EMBRACE IT.

Thats a great thought multiplex! I never really thought of it like that! To bad there isn't a comfortable 73 degree scenario for our problem!

Kind of a long shot, but maybe it could just be likened to human nature. When we're hot, we wish we were cold. When we're cold, we wish we're hot. Sounds very similar. I think that we just give the paradox you're describing more weight because it has to do with actual emotion and the sensations surrounding it, rather than physical feeling which is much more easy to explain.<br />
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Just a thought.