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I Need More

Do you know people that go on and on about the most mundane topics? Have you ever tried to engage them in meaningful conversation and they ignore your prompt, getting right back in the saddle of their enlightening conversation regarding their garden club's, (after meeting) stimulating debate on the question of adding low fat chicken broth or low fat milk to diet mashed potatoes? "Helen says that she read in her weight watchers book that milk is richer than chicken broth, but, I think chicken broth makes it taste better.....blah blah blah, comma, blah blah blah"
Well, if so, do not feel alone. The last time I had a meaningful conversation with one of my local pals was sometime in the 1990's. Everyone changed at some point and I did not get the memo. My girl pals and I used to stay up all night and discuss meaningful things like philosophy and spirituality, art, literature, love, romance, sex, feelings, relationships. Now, I get emails that say. "Hi, been busy, no time, will write soon" No one talks anymore about anything much! Why do they even bother with email? I already knew that they could type a few words....no one calls and actually "shares" anymore, well almost no one. When they do call, it is generally concerning folksy tid bits about their grand kids, with the kid screaming like a "stuck pig" in the back ground. I love to chat about my Jace, but, I don't call friends up when he is having a melt down... just to share.
hillbillycrone hillbillycrone 56-60, F 11 Responses Dec 31, 2011

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True conversation is difficult to come by.It is supposed to be a two way street permitting the uninterrupted back and forth flow of thoughts and,hopefully, illuminating responses.In actuality, it is,more often than not,used as a mode of "talking at" someone with no interest in eliciting a thoughtful and perhaps even an insightful response. why is that.?

I spent a frustrating afternoon at a party having conversations with people I didn't know lasting less than 2 minutes before an interruption. <br />
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Needless to say it was a long day, concluded by some more important conversations here.

Sometimes I just stare in wonder at people, I really do!

I understand this too, I really don't think that I have had a meaningful conversation since the 90s either and even then they were few and far between! I have to use ep and the internet in general to read and join in discussions that interest me, without this there would be virtually nothing to stimulate my brain!! All anyone wants to do, is as you say, moan about mundane things or sit in a vegetative state in front of the TV!...thank goodness for outlets such as ep!!

So that's what you think of our deep and meaningful 21st century conversations -*sulks* - I shall go off and see just how many miles per gallon I can get out of my car on the journey to work maybe that will interest you?

ha ha...I do apologise..but of course I was not referring to you at all...I have always found you to be very 'stimulating!!'... lol :))
Oh and btw I have no doubt that you already know 'exactly' how many miles to the gallon you can get out of your car?! :)) xx

I feel similar. Sometimes I just think what is the point of that? We are all different and all have different interests but everyone my age seems so obsessed with things like fake tans, celebrities, calorie counting and don't get me wrong, I am a real girls girl. I love fashion, getting manicures, beauty treatments, shopping but sometimes I want more then that. I want conversations about the things that matter. I want my questions to be answered, to have someone to relate to me and to share what REALLY gets me and which makes me me. Sometimes I think I am just too deep and sensitive for this world. I just want to know that it all means something if that makes sense.<br />
Thank you for writing this. xx<br />
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PS: Had to laugh at the *stuck pig* comment as well. As you know, I don't have kids but working with them I know what sound you mean!

I am so happy you "got" this post, you've been there, not everyone "gets" me Jenni, bless you!

The bane of my life has been trying not to appear anti-social and "slightly up myself" while the conversation around me centres on football (aussie rules or rugby) or cricket, latest video clip, rock group, famous star's divorce.....<br />
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At parties I often sit in the corner, until I overhear something with some depth...usually to do with religion, sex, politics etc and then join in.<br />
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My former in-laws had a nack for the trivia of life, my mum also (Auntie Irene's bunions....). I don't think I ever looked down at them, but when my wife and I split, they took great delight in telling me I had a superiority complex. ( I think it more likely projection on their part - they felt inferior).<br />
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One benefit of the net which is under-appreciated is that it has made finding like minded people much easier...especially those with at least one similar aspect, but very different other aspects - to encourage variety. This site does that much better than facebook etc which promotes sameness through the linking strategy (your friends or relatives).

I always appreciate your comments. Your input is rich. I "get" you! I think that your sensitivity and brilliance could have been intimidating to your former in-laws. :-)

Yes, it gets to the point where you crave being able to talk to someone about something other than the price of fish. I recently started back at college and it's been great to be in an environment where it's possible to discuss many and varied things in depth. I've always been the sort of person who has a lot of totally useless information at my fingertips, I guess that comes with age to some extent!

Going back to college sounds very interesting, perhaps I should do that? I think that I am in a rut....what are you studying?

it's been brilliant ... I am doing a post-graduate diploma in health promotion.

I have just spent time away visiting relatives ..they are still telling the same stories they've been churning out for past twenty years or more .. nothing new at all :(<br />
I find most people prefer to watch TV than talk about anything meaningful. We are all on a very short journey in this life yet most of us talk about anything but, seems very sad and short sighted.

I am with you....I guess that is why we have our beloved EP friends! Thank you for being one of mine!

I thank you very much, your points and insights are spot on. I enjoyed your comments, I am glad that you stopped by!

I think there are academics out there commenting on the effect of possible "overuse" of the internet for both children and adults. It does seem that people generally have difficulty in maintaining a conversation that is of any meaning at all. Maybe peoples attention span is just getting less and less? Maybe people are too self-centred to be able to pay attention to anyone but themselves for any amount of time?

I fear that this is exactly what is happening. Thank You.

Actually, butter was two for five bucks yesterday, it gets higher every time I buy it......and THAT was the sale price...I used to use margarine, but, I heard on Oprah that margarine has those unhealthy fats or preservatives or something or others in it and so, I swore it off. Yes, I know, butter is nothing but pure lard bucket fat, but, what is a girl to do, my wrinkles ruin any chance of me ever looking good again anyway, I think maybe the fat makes me look a little younger, you know how fat young girls are nowadays..any whooo So, when I got my butter there was this woman in the dairy isle and I noticed that she was buying tons and tons of sour cream, well, I just had to find out why, I mean who needs that much sour cream? So I got closer, to hear what she was saying....she was with her husband, well I guess he was her husband, they looked married, he was kind of pounchy and so was she..anyway...she said, "Larry, can I freeze sour cream?" Larry sad that he didn't know, I know, but, I didn't say because it really wasn't any of my business, you know they both sort of looked familiar, but, what do you do, just walk right up and ask them who they are, I think maybe she went to school with my sister and he used to drive the school bus, back to the sour cream, there was just tons and tons of it, I wonder? Every time I stand around in the dairy isle like that I just start achin' in my hips, and legs,,,some days my knees won't even allow me to sit on the toilet, oh my god, did you see Linda Smith, honey she is on a cane, how old is she, well, I swear, she is younger than you and I, now about that Larry, do you think that might have been Larry Smith, wasn't he good looking in school, didn't Brenda Jones date him in the tenth grade, my god, if it is him, he is so old looking..................;-)))))

Ralphie, don't mess with Gran, she is big and mean...and sometimes she just cannot shut her ever lovin mouth.

AHAHAHAHH omg its so true!

:-O teehee :-)

Oh, how I understand this! I can't count the times I've been trapped in said conversations with people just like this as my eyes glaze over. I try to change the subject to something more stimulating but... alas. They are a crafty bunch!<br />
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I'd also add that I want to run when people start talking about their aches and pains ad nauseum. (I got trapped in such a conversation over Christmas, but my delightful glass of red wine helped me greatly) <br />
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I laughed out loud at your chicken broth example... thanks for that.

Ah....you have been there! Peace and Happy New Year!! Thanks for reading this and for commenting.