Wish I Could Find Some

It's crazy for me to read your guys stories, because for the longest time, I thought that I was the only one! I too love solitude, but am lonely allot of the time. I feel that I need friends that are the same way, that way when they don't hear from me, until I need some socialization, they will understand and not be offended. I have come across too many people that I seem to "disappoint" because I dont feel that I should have to talk to them everyday, all day in order to be a "friend" Yet at the same time, many friends have come and gone, due to my choice to enjoy solitude. So the quesion is, where are the people out there that dont need the constant communication to keep a friendship going? I am a good friend, would do anything for a person I considered a friend, but I dont need friends around all the time in order to prove that to them. Make sense?

Thank you for your wise words...yes, that is it exactly...people do not understand unless they have 'been in your shoes'.

yes I really experience what you're saying being lonely with people around you is the worst I used to think I should be in group of people to be alive but it just made me v

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•?1ncholic I had hard time with myself and I thought that's because I'm not with other people but it took time to realize that the solitude is hard because I smothered myself with folks and it's stupid and shallow

Wildly contradicting need for the society of others! Boy you can say that again. But I am glad to hear I am not the only one. Thanks.

I know the feeling of solitude. My mother raised me to truly appreciate that and she succeeded with flying colors. But somehow I also developed a wildly contradicting need for the society of others---that is when I feel like having them around. So because of that I have quite a fluctuating personality if you can imagine. It all depends on my mood or how creative or contemplative or outgoing I'm feeling on a given day. And because of that, I ultimately find it hard to make and keep friends. So my solitude has made me lonely. It sucks.

I was reading on the internet that this phenomenon (which I feel often) is attributed to having negative thought processes. I don't know if this helps but I have searched for years for an answer and this is now pointing me in the right direction towards finding happiness.

Sometimes divorce can be freeing (not that I know but have dreamed of it at times). Because you can map out what your dreams and intentions are and then move towards them without having to worry about someone else. However, I am learning to do that anyway.

I lived in a marriage where the only thing we shared was the same roof, so that kind of loneliness is one of the saddest.

Now that I am divorced, I dont feel lonely (as lonely ), I have my moments, but basically what I enjoy the most is being able to have my own space that I can enjoy without ignoring anyone, or being ignored by.