I Enjoy Witty Humour
Maggie and Mammy were excited. They had been invited to Kathleen’s for Christmas and were looking forward to the company and crack.
On Christmas Eve they woke to an unexpected cold snap. By midday the snow was heavy. As darkness fell their tiny cottage perched atop a remote hill was freezing fast.
“Phone Kathleen, see if her fella can pick us up on the tractor tonight?” said Mammy.
When Maggie picked up the phone her heart sank – the line was dead!
Mammy remained calm and practical, “Fill the buckets Maggie, just in case.” She turned the tap, it gave a jerky splutter – no water!
Mammy whispered a Hail Mary as the TV screen flickered, before turning into a fizzy fuzz – no telly!
“The radio?” said Mammy – thank God it worked.
She had an idea: Kathleen always listened to the local radio station. It was broadcast from a farmhouse about two miles away. She instructed Maggie to trek over and ask the announcer to put out a message; Kathleen was sure to hear it and come to the rescue. Mammy always had the answers thought Maggie as she set off.
It was a tough journey, but Maggie made it and burst into the make-shift studio unannounced. Hysterically, she began recounting her plight, interspersed with pleas for help.
The announcer, a portly man, was taken aback and put on a record to disguise the intrusion from his listeners. He was angry, “You can’t just come in her like this young lady, where are your manners? And I have a full schedule, I don’t have a spot for you, look at the length of this list of messages,” he said, pointing to a full note pad. Maggie begged, “Please, I’ll do anything for ya, if you just let me put out a quick message.”
“NO!”
“Please, I’ll do anything, please!”
The announcer put on another record and asked for her name?
“OK Maggie, you’ll do anything?” He said with a leery eye.
“I will!” She said with an eager smile.
The announcer pulled out his Mickey Jo which stood to attention before Maggie’s hopeful eyes.
“Do you know what this is Maggie?”
“I do!”
“And you said you’ll do anything?”
“I will!”
“Go ahead then Maggie.”
She grabbed hold of his Mickey Jo with a firm hand and moved her head carefully towards it. Her lips quivered with anticipation. She took a sharp intake of breath and began with gusto: “Hello Kathleen, I hope you’re listening to this, me and Mammy are stuck…”
On Christmas Eve they woke to an unexpected cold snap. By midday the snow was heavy. As darkness fell their tiny cottage perched atop a remote hill was freezing fast.
“Phone Kathleen, see if her fella can pick us up on the tractor tonight?” said Mammy.
When Maggie picked up the phone her heart sank – the line was dead!
Mammy remained calm and practical, “Fill the buckets Maggie, just in case.” She turned the tap, it gave a jerky splutter – no water!
Mammy whispered a Hail Mary as the TV screen flickered, before turning into a fizzy fuzz – no telly!
“The radio?” said Mammy – thank God it worked.
She had an idea: Kathleen always listened to the local radio station. It was broadcast from a farmhouse about two miles away. She instructed Maggie to trek over and ask the announcer to put out a message; Kathleen was sure to hear it and come to the rescue. Mammy always had the answers thought Maggie as she set off.
It was a tough journey, but Maggie made it and burst into the make-shift studio unannounced. Hysterically, she began recounting her plight, interspersed with pleas for help.
The announcer, a portly man, was taken aback and put on a record to disguise the intrusion from his listeners. He was angry, “You can’t just come in her like this young lady, where are your manners? And I have a full schedule, I don’t have a spot for you, look at the length of this list of messages,” he said, pointing to a full note pad. Maggie begged, “Please, I’ll do anything for ya, if you just let me put out a quick message.”
“NO!”
“Please, I’ll do anything, please!”
The announcer put on another record and asked for her name?
“OK Maggie, you’ll do anything?” He said with a leery eye.
“I will!” She said with an eager smile.
The announcer pulled out his Mickey Jo which stood to attention before Maggie’s hopeful eyes.
“Do you know what this is Maggie?”
“I do!”
“And you said you’ll do anything?”
“I will!”
“Go ahead then Maggie.”
She grabbed hold of his Mickey Jo with a firm hand and moved her head carefully towards it. Her lips quivered with anticipation. She took a sharp intake of breath and began with gusto: “Hello Kathleen, I hope you’re listening to this, me and Mammy are stuck…”
By:
gerardfsmith
Age:
41-45
,
Male
