What Is...?

It's been three years being here and I've come to a point of impasse. This led me to ask faerieself... what is EP? Like what the friggin' heck is EP to faerie, to my life.

And I only hear an echo... ... ...

I can't let it go though. I can not make myself delete my account. I can't even log back to stare at the delete button. So I brooded over this for some time. Too many events transpired over the last couple of months... ... okay, the whole friggin' year... and it's wrong... not the events... something is... and I can't quite grasp what it is.

Then you come across something one day... something that you think you know... but well, either too stubborn or too afraid to dance with the thought... so I watch it glide... sometimes it is skipping and flipping about... then would prance slowly with its flitting movements... and faerie remained still... watching it move about...

Perhaps there is nothing to grasp really. What EP is, is what it is. Whatever that means. How we tend to make it our lifestyle, our world, our escape, our pastime - this is a choice. So how it turns out, virtual as it may be, it's as uncontrollable as real life is.

I dunno... I feel like I'm almost understanding it... yet faerie struggles. As if there are not enough struggles already in my world! And the struggling is the letting go part. Not let go of EP... but let go of... ... of... an idea of EP? Of that struggling idea of EP? But what is it?

Help me out here... I don't even know what I need to let go of.

I want to know what EP is to you? Do we share the same thoughts? Same feelings? Same attachment?
If it's working out well for you to be here... I want to know how you do it. I want to know what EP is that allows you to drift effortlessly here... not struggle.... and just be. And perhaps with a different approach, faerie can be.
I so want to know what is...

... ... ...

And Happy New Year...  may you each have happy thoughts, if not for the whole year, but for most of the year. My heart wishes your heart joy.

Shanti! Shanti! Shanti!

Sylphy Sylphy
41-45, F
1 Response Jan 6, 2013

You've already answered your own question. EP is whatever we make it. For me, it is a place to go where people accept me as I am without judging (for the most part). I basically just go with the flow here - gravitating to whatever works for me at the moment.

"Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like." ~ Lao-Tzu