Lost Coward

This whole week was so much crappy, I can say. I knew that my Dad has another women.Thinking of it makes my heart beaten by a thousand rocks. and so does my Mom. I never thought he could do such thing. I mean. I know he's not perfect and I never asked him to be one. All we demand as his family is for him to be honest with us. I can't help but cry everytime I see those text messages from that ***** on his phone. Its makes a punch in my heart. He never admit nor deny about this. And everytime we ask him , he ends up getting mad at us. I'm so feel down. Adding the fact that I'm hating school now. I just can't understand them. there comes the pressure, the expectations, those perfect professors and many more. I somehow feel like an idiot roaming around this world. Worthless.Pitying herself.Sounds unlucky huh? And now, I cut class. I don't know what's the best thing to do atm.. Honestly, the reason why I cut class is because I'm scared of my professor. For me, and maybe for my classmates too, thinks that he is so strict and never accept failures.. Maybe this is overstatement. but It goes between the line. And this guy that I've fallen for. After all those sweet talks we had, he's now ignoring me or something. I really don't know. I greeted him on his birthday last monday. I said that he was like ignoring me and said sorry If I did something wrong. He did reply. Unexpectedly. He said that he's not ignoring me. that he's been really busy lately that's why. But I promise to myself and to him that I won't disturb him anymore. Maybe I was this damn girl giving meanings to his actions. That I really should'nt done.He thanked me . but I'm not sure if its for my greetings on him or when I said that I'll never bother him again? Maybe both. Now,my friends and my family are the ones who keep me going.. I hope I would be brave enough to face all of these trials.. I need some advice please? It would really mean a lot :)
Jeyey Jeyey
18-21, F
Aug 1, 2012