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A Violent History

I met my 1st husband when I was 15. He started out by overwhelming me with how much he loved me and how beautiful I was and how much he loved being with me. He slowly got rid of all my friends by taking up all my time, then causing problems with my parents by telling me how unfair they were to me. Then he started the crap of how I hurt his feelings when I talked to other guys. How I hurt his feelings when I wore make-up. Pretty soon I felt responsible for all his feelings so when he started to knock me around, I took the blame for that too. And it started with him grabbing my arm a little too tight. It ended with him beating me up like I was another guy! He then moved on to wife # 2 and almost killed her twice. Put her in the hospital, but she wouldn't press charges. Wife #3 was more to his liking. She just stayed home, cooked, cleaned and gave him sex whenever he wanted it and never asked any questions or complained. Then he molested her two daughters. I learned through the years that violence is about control and hate. I also learned that I am never, ever responsable for someone elses actions. What a person does is always, ALWAYS, their choice. No one elses. I take responsibility for everything I do and insist that the people in my life do the same. When a person wants to make me responsible for their actions, I call them on it. If they don't get it, I don't hang with them anymore. I will not waste anymore of my life on people who treat me badly. No one should.

Artisina Artisina 46-50, F 1 Response Mar 16, 2008

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Good advice!