Am I Infertile?

This is a very bad feeling. I'm nearly 30 and maybe I will never have a child. An own child of course. A child from me and from my husband. It makes me slowly going crazy. I still can't be sure, because there weren't serious examinations. But more than one year is gone since  we try...

I hate it when I have my menses. And I hate it to see other happy people with their children. How I envy them! Why is it that nothing is easy in my life? It was hard to find my job, the job that is for me. It was not easy to find my man. But I just did it.

Somewhere deep I maybe knew that it won't be easy either. I have been ill and I'm still ill. I have inflammation. There. And I fear that this is why it doesn't work... I don't know.

My husband is trying to understand it. But he seems to care about other things. About problems of everyday living, money. He doesn't want to go to the doctor. It is only one thing that I ask. But he just seems to me doesn't care about it.

I don't know what to do. We love each other. He says that he wants a child too but I can't feel it....:-(((
dreamygirl dreamygirl
31-35, F
Aug 16, 2007