I Hide From The World
I was diagnosed bipolar in 2005 which automatically made me "different", especially since I was a cheerleader, honor student, etc. in highschool, we weren't allowed to have 'issues'. Then I got a brain injury July 18th 2008. I can't drive becaused I have uncontrolled epilepsy (still in medicational limbo) and I can't work because I have to many health and mental problems that have yet to be controlled and/or cured. I feel "different" because to look at me, there is no obvious physical illness. I have the 'silent injury'. When I go into public and have to interact with people, I feel stupid. They sometimes look at me like i'm 'crazy' because I don't make sense sometimes. I can't dress 'cute' because I have vertigo and balance problems, so I have to wear Nike Shox everyday, because i'm less likely to bust my rear in those. I get confused and wander off in big and/or crowded places. I've had people walk up to me and ask me if i'm okay. Like i'm a kid that has lost their parent. Therefore, I chose to stay at home, in pajamas and hide from the world. All of my social interaction is done online. Usually Facebook, until I discovered EP yesterday. And i'm glad I did, because I would have never posted this on FB for fear of my friends knowing the truth.
I don't try to fit in socially anymore and I don't really give a * anymore either....although i'm the rockinest person I know, I don't want anybody else to really know the post-injured person...and I think that's ok.