Please Just Read This Sonebody It Would Really Help

I just want somebody to tell me everything is going to be okay. I feel so low and shamed of myself and its hurts to bad to the point where I wanna die just kill myself and die.I let my mom down and I don't know what to do. Ever since I lost my virginity she throws it I. .y face and say all these mean things that really hurts. She doesn't let me hang out with my friends like I'm always in the house 24/7 and without a phone like I feel like such a loner. I know losing my virginity at a young age was a bad idea and I regret it on so many levels but when its constantly being thrown in your face what do you do? All I know how to do is cry! I have no one to talk to and I feel like no one would really understand what I go through. Me and my mom has the hardest relationship and I Hate it. I'm in ace classes so she feels like I should be getting really good grades and that's true I should but its hard with all kinds od Negitivee people around you I try but I let everything gets the best of me. My mom looks down on me and now make sure my little brother and sister aren't like me and THATS WHAT HURTS THE MOST IT KILK S ME THAT SHE HAS ALL THESE THOUGHTS ABOUT ME AND I HATE THE THOUGHT OF IT ALL! IT KILLS ME AND I CRY AS I WRITE THIS. I Juss want a regular life and I wanna make my proud of me but ghats gonna take the rest of life. I just wish I had Sonebody to talk to. WHATS MY POINT IN LIVING????? I HATE TO QUESTION GOD BUT ITS JUSS SO PAINFUL! I FEEL HORRIBLE I JUST WISH THINGS WOULD CHANGE FOR ME! I know this is a lot reading but please take the time just to read it and tell me everything is going to be Oka.
DyingInside12 DyingInside12
13-15, F
May 21, 2012