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Still My Heart Is Open

I have accepted that a person's basic nature doesn't change and part of my personality is being open to having a deep connection with another person.  More than that, opening my heart and allowing someone in.  I suppose the good part is that it is very rare.  I am discerning and have to see an exceptional quality in a person in order to unlock my heart and let them inside.  Still it's hurtful and disappointing to find you are just a part of a collection and worse still, not even the most prized in a collection.  It's humiliating to believe words are sincere then pouring out your feelings only to realize the only sincere words were your own.  In usual fashion I search to find the silver lining and this is it - another part of my personality is that I accept reality, let go of the hurt and move forward.  It's what keeps me going every day in life.  I know I am stronger than I once was and that what once could devastate me is now easier to get past.  It's a sign of growth and faith in myself knowing I can handle whatever life throws at me.
deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Mar 20, 2012

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what a lovely story, i really like the way that you have put this together, keep yourself strong and try n keep your heart open, because you only deserve the best!<br />
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My best to you<br />
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Pete

So how long did it take before to get past a heartbreak, and how long would it take now. Doesn't todays answer depend on how attached, and in love you were with the person? <br />
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Intellectually, I know all the things you stated, but it can still hurt. That is the human side of our spiritual Being.

Go back to not attaching oneself to things. This is the way to be. We shouldnt be too concerned about what others are doing. I'm not being critical of you, just trying to help. I have felt nice, positive, loving feelings for a few women on here. I think I seek emotional and intellectual intimacy. Sometimes I think Im pathetic for feeling such a deep need to connect, but I wont let myself get down on myself. Its sad if others have mislead you into believing you were somehow a one and only special thing to them. Thats so dishonest and unnecessary. Be strong, but don't close yourself off to people, because that will only disserve you.

This is quite beautiful. I can't imagine anybody I've ever known who wouldn't be thrilled to be yours... but there are fools out there I suppose...