Roller Coaster

It's like a never ending cycle. I'm getting so sick of all this. One day me and my boyfriend are perfect and im at an all time high of joy...then the next he ignores me and i feel like my world is dark and gray. How could I let this one person control all my emotions and life. I feel so empty, like i lost MYself. I've gaven my mind, soul, heart, and thoughts to someone else. I no longer control my brain. I need it back. I cannot let this person who im not even sure i am IN love with anymore. Sure, I love him...but its fading. My heart is empty, thumping, and sick when we are fighting or he hurts me. I feel like I have no control, I cannot stand up for anything with him. I can never stick to my word, ignore him for a day, or not forgive him...when i know its the right thing to do. I need my soul back to myself, enough of giving it away.
xxDreamerXx88 xxDreamerXx88
18-21, F
May 9, 2012