My Invisible Soul.

Here again, I am contemplating before putting my hidden emotions into words. Again,my mind is perplexed and asking reasons, why I need to tell the whole community about my feelings.Do I enough know about people here? Do they know enough about me? Do they worthy enough to share my inner soul with them? How they will respond hearing my inside soul voice?
And when no one has a time and really cares about anyone feelings in this world. Everyone like to hear the stories about life ,about sad ,ill , & broken feelings. And, no one likes to pay attention or figure out the reasons of damaged , broken , hurtful feelings.So, why not I better shut up my screaming feelings of my soul?
Fortunately, experience project is a place , where today , I will not cover up my feelings.I will disclose my inner soul to my coomunity.
I experienced that friends and family are always the one , who first perceived your different feelings , and they easily recognized about your different emotions. During my trouble emotions , my mother always noticed & made out easily , that something is bothering me.No matter , how much I ignored to her, she always unbottled my emotions. And , after sharing my feelings to her, I always get bad remarks, criticism , over protection .So, I learnt that I will better keep my inner soul hidden & conceal with outside public.Even though, it was something impossible for me to keep my feelings out of sight for so long. But , I tried & unaccomplished.

I remember the days, when I was learning chinese language with my friend. We had our vactaions, so we both joined the institute at the same hour class. There was a guy , who used to teach us speaking skills in our class. After few days ,I noticed that guy was extraordinarily nice to me. But, I didn't tell my friend about this observation, and I kept quiet.And, one day, he asked me , that he is interested in me & want to talk on phone aswell. Hearing all this I was little confused, and I shared all with my friend .Moreover, I also told her, that I also like the guy very much & am ready to talk to him on phone. Foolishly, I disclosed all my feelings to her.After that incident, everybody knew about this affair, I felt so ashamed & embarrased in my friends & family.

sanasafinaz sanasafinaz
26-30, F
5 Responses Aug 5, 2010

I feels ready sad about our culture how our parents react rather understanding and guiding us for our problems.. One of good friend of mine hav said when boys and girls start looking forshoulders it means true understanding between parents are not thr.. These youngster find themselves alone in their feeling and they start looking... MashaAllah sinve i hav starting reading about islam and how to be in relationship in all aspects of life i really understand that how badly we r influencef by our which is really making things complicated.. Islamically everything has value and soo much openess that one if follow never loose their loved ones.. The way ur mother has reacted and others hav reacted after knowing someone is interested is sooo extremely wrong that such kind of things lead the younsters do more bad hiddenly coz then devil trap them and giv them smart ideas .. I pray and advice you to keep yourself calm and when someone show any interest in you like to talk on phone and all be straight forward and ask if he is real man and muslim comein respected manner rather then like a coward... Tc may Allah swt make our elders understand our emotional needs..

Thanks u loads n loads amman.<br />
<br />
I have my same wishes and prayers for you too.

this is quiet innocent part of you... but I guess for a female its really important to disclose her feelings to only someone who is either very very close.. or the one who can understand her... as far this loving a guy becoz of noticing is concerned.. it is just affection... i better suggest females to never giv 100percent feelings to anyguy untill he takes u under his nikah inshaAllah..and choose a person who is pious in nature,forgiving and flexible in understanding... sam i pray inshaAllah for you and for my other Muslim and non Muslim bros and siss that they will get right partners for their life.. inshaAllah... just take care alot ... work hard on root (Imaan) maintain good health, ever be forgiving and join the people who are thankful... & salam alaikum :)

Same is the case withe me yaar, Sometime i too feel the same and hence i think i should keep myself only upto myself, but u know what, it just that its natural feeling of sharing and being open in our behaviour is something we believe to do...<br />

Hey~ me; thanks for the comment.