Only When They Want Something.

I feel ingored. My "friends" only ever call or write when they want something from me. If they are having a hard time and need someone to listen, they call me. If they need money, they call me. If their dog got into rat poison and they remember that I worked with a vet, they call me. If I call them, they'e busy. If I write them, they may take months to write back, if they write back at all. And it isn't just friends, it's family as well. If I need to get out, hang out with someone, they've got other things to do. I brought it on myself. For years I was such a recluse that I would rarely accept invitations to spend time with people. I don't like to spend a lot of time on the phone, either. If someone wants to talk to me, I listen, but I rarely just call to chat. Now no matter how I try to get attention, it's like I'm a ghost. I honestly think no one likes me anymore. They've given up on me. I'm starting to wonder if I'm beyond redemption. It's not that I'm a bad person. I may be opinionated, but I would never hurt a fly (or even a spider). I don't lie, I don't use drugs, and I rarely drink. I don't steal or pick fights or cause trouble. I'm a bookworm with a 4.0 gpa. I feel like I'm from another planet, and I don't know what to do. My peers think I'm just weird. I'm young, but I listen to things like big band, jazz, and classical music. I watch black and white movies or old horror flicks. I read Jane Austen and Daphne Du Maurier. I collect live plants. I have entirely too many pets. I have a fiance, and he loves me, but even he thinks I'm weird. I feel like I just haven't found the right kind of people to be friends with. I don't think there is anything wrong with who I am. I just wish I could find someone else who agreed.

MelancholyCheer MelancholyCheer
3 Responses Mar 6, 2009

Well, maybe you should call one of your friends and explain it to them like you've explained it on your story - a little less blunt, perhaps. Maybe put it more like "I miss you, we haven't spent time together, I'd love to see you." I'm sure that's true about at least one friend. If you've been reclusive and turned down offers to do things in the past, then you've rejected them. <br />
<br />
Also, people do get so wrapped up in their own lives, it happens to all of us. It's important to understand that perspective...they don't understand that you need to connect with people right now, and they won't understand that unless you tell them. <br />
<br />
Maybe join a writer's group. New friends, no history, people with whom you have interests in common. I always found them to be really enjoyable, in much more of a social way than in a "study of the craft" way.<br />
<br />
Best of luck!

Thank you. That was actually very helpful. It's a perpective I hadn't considered.

I don't think ur weird at all ur just different then most people.<br />
People like u but due to the difference in personalities they might have trouble communicating correctly and as an evidence on what I say they reach for u when they need ur help. as human beings we seek the help of people we trust their judgments, people who we know when ever we knock on their doors they will open.<br />
I'm starting to be like u I refuse to go out with my friends couz I usually don't have money or they go out in times that don't suite me.<br />
I some times blame my self but then why we all r different.<br />
Try to be there in gathering even if u feel u don't want to ... I wish I could help in any way , if there is any thing I could do I would be glad to .<br />
Have a good day :)