Yes, I Feel Life Is Just Passing Me By Because...

I have moved and lived in so many places the last 10 years that I wasn't around long enough for someone to get to know me. Either I moved for a better job, or to help out an elderly family member, or I lost a job, or I was homeless or going to be homeless, or I was moving away from a bad relationship.  It was for all of those reasons.  I picked up a few so-called friends along the way but what it boils down to is life is just passing me by because these so-called friends don't even know where I am now because they never really cared me anyway. Even if I wasn't at that place where they knew me from then they could still call me.  I still have the same cellphone number.  I've had it for years.  Its never been disconnected.  The line is always open.  But nobody calls.  If I don't call anybody, nobody calls me. Nobody.  Oh yeah, I can call them and most of them take the time to talk to me and some even cut it short with a hello and goodbye chat.  I feel life is just passing me by because I don't exist.  I can put on a big front and act like I am the happiest person because I figured out already nobody wants to be bothered with me if I am talking depressed and am down and lonely.  Nobody wants to fool with me all except when I act like I am so busy and I am not lonely, then that's when they'll talk.  But I always have to call them.  Why?  Because they have a life, that's why. I don' have a life. I feel as though life is just passing me by. I am so lonely I go to church just to get hugged. I feel like screaming to the world to hear "Hey everybody I am alive! Doesn't anybody care? I do exist" and I would ask somebody to call me.  Yes call me.  And you know what?
lifeisanotabowlofcherries lifeisanotabowlofcherries
51-55, F
3 Responses May 25, 2012

Get involved with church ministries. Join the outreach team, the cell or any ministry at church, it will help you. And have rest in your life in jesus's name.

Thank you Craig for carrying. Don't worry, I am not suicidal and I definitely do not take it out on others because that is mean spirited. I am not a mean spirited person. Life is too short to be carrying around negativity. I'm still lonely though.... even in paradise.

Dear, please do not do anything like suicide or taking it out on others.<br />
If it helps at all, your story mirrors mine. I don't have all the answers,<br />
but I reach out my hand to hold yours. I do care and hope my gesture<br />
will ease your pain some.<br />
<br />