Don't Know Where Life Is Going...

I feel like a loser. I am 24 years old, almost 25 this year. I barely feel confident since I was a kid.
I struggled not to harm myself about 10 years till a couple of years ago. Even now sometimes I have this thought slip into my head. But it makes me feel easier and familiar like I know who I used to be.
About 18 years old, I ran away from home. I got a scholarship to study in Japan for my bachelor degree, and now a master in Europe.
After leaving home about 4, 5 years, I finally am able to have a conversation with my parents without being anxious and scared.
Till now I have one brother who I haven't talked to for many years, and a sister who lives at home but has unsteady emotional problems.
I don't know what I am going to do and where I am going after I graduate.
I don't have any specific interest in life and don't know how to establish a close relationship with my family.
My dad is a very successful person, I feel sorry to be myself for my parents.
lilyc78 lilyc78
22-25, F
May 5, 2012