I Feel Like An Alien In An Alien World
Everyone looks like an alien. Is the basic jist I guess. This has surfaced more significantly over the past year or so. I havent been depressed or had panic attacks for a year though. I really miss how I used to see the world/people and i'm wondering if its why I have a strong desire to be by myself most of the time now. I don't really get much time to myself because so many people seem to love me, which does just great for the crushing self-loathing ;D
So before, I would zone out and have flashes of vision where everything suddenly becomes than über-real, as if i'm seeing it for the first time. This was strange, but i'm sure it's quite a common thing for most people to get. Earlier this year, I started experiencing these zone outs again, except more substantially. They are hardly disabling but this is now how I see the world all the time.
I doubt it'd disturb me so much if things weren't so different. I've grown to find the way a lamp's light reflects on someone's face repulsive. And when someone smiles all I can concentrate on is the way their skin and muscles move. I can't see humans as familiar ob
I'm obviously the alien in this case, but I feel like I'm the only human. As much as I identify with being a misanthrope, I believe this is completely an aesthetic issue (at the moment)
It'd mean a lot if anyone else out there feels similair to me. Or has any light to shed on the matter.
