I Don't Want To Have "peaked" Already.. :-/


I know lots of people have many big dreams from an early age & that the sad fact of life is, few people escape the misery of being forced to redefine those dreams to accommodate harsh reality.

BUT :) I still feel like I'm an exception. I just don't feel as if I have an accurate scale to measure my success because I was SOOOOO successful in youth. Its affecting my happiness. I am fairly successful & fairly happy but, that has never ever been my only goal in life nor do I want it to be. Comparatively speaking, I'm nothing now in my "adult-state" but I know that, since before the age of 10 I was accomplishing things adults only hope to achieve, I know I am capable of rocking this world. So why am I not doing it RIGHT NOW? & How should I begin?

As a kid, my IQ was off the charts; I began speaking sentences when I was 6 months old; I could read when I was 2; I was a fairly successful child model and actress, and I played many instruments very well from the age of 3. I wrote a book before I was 10; owned my high school socially despite transferring; held multiple club leadership positions simultaneously; played leads in musicals and plays since the first time I auditioned; participated in sports (albeit poorly :P) & graduated college summa *** laude & PBK in 4 years with multiple degrees.

My question is, ******* now what? My plan originally was to get my PhD because, well you can't get much better than that, but I don't need it any more because I changed my career to something that makes me even happier & requires lesser qualifications. I make a difference in the lives of individuals every day. It's nothing new & don't get me wrong, I adore the people I help & I enjoy it more than anything, but I know I have the capacity to also make a huge difference all at once. I know I do.

As an adult, I now see that it is difficult to achieve many diverse impressive accomplishments. It feels like you can only rock at 1 or 2 things as an adult & sit back & watch the rest of the world's occupants rock at their 1 or 2 specialties. Am I overthinking this? I just feel like I'm not living up to my potential & even though Im making a difference & making myself happy, it's still not enough. It just isnt. I dont know if Im seeking advice or camaraderie with people who share a similar experience. But yeah... all dat stuff I said ^^ (:-P)

DoctorBlueDream DoctorBlueDream
22-25, F
1 Response Dec 1, 2012

I think lives do peak, although I think some people find their way around this. These people probably have dreams which don't require a lot of energy so they can be content with them as they get older. I can sympathize with you about being intellectually curious about many things but only having the capacity to be good at a few.