I Feel Like Im Missing Something
I feel like there is something missing in my life,like that extra step to something?
can someone ask me a question and help me narrow it down?
well maybe just to start,so it could possibly help me or someone ask a helpful question or give some insight,
here are some things I thought could be causing me to feel like that one "piece" in my life is missing.
- i've detached myself from all high school friends and aqaitances I feel I attach to them bad memories and I just find that these friendships were patronizing formed and pity formed so I let go of them.
- doing that i feel how i felt when I was in ellementry alone,insecure and confused
- my kung-fu club that ive been part of(its like a extended family , non commercial) my sifu is moving away due to the economic crisis and possibly the assistant instucter. I felt like that club was the only constant good thing in my life and it feels like its on rocky grounds due to this economic problems.it has been my source of confidence
- my source of confidence is rocky and now i feel shacky like if my club starts to get smaller and smaller I dont know what to do...I feel scared abit I have nerver anticipated this happening im very close to all the guys there,they are like brothers to me and me their little sister.
- the rcmp are hiring officers but ive just started cejep and am mising the oportunity to my dream job and i am worried that when im ready to apply they wont need me and ive been set on that job for a long time.
i feel very unstable I miss having a best friend.
-oh and in the past my two best friends moved to Italy and Japan
Maybe what im missing is the connection all us humans need...I need to open myself up to a friend and be ME no pretend or try to impress be me and thats all
I dont think i've ever been myself whitout some sort of facade or trying to be what soceity wants..
I dont think I know how to really be myself..how to enjoy someones company without having a forced smile or feeling self-consious I miss when I HAD a best friends and we would play together cry together I shared myself with her now I feel so isolated even at my club I feel that isolation come and go. i didnt feel stis way since i started training at my club until i realized i dont hang out with them even when they invite me except for once..
i dont know how to do it,I dont want to feel like this anymore,I want to connect make a bext friend feel needed and not be the one needing.
can someone help me understand how to do this? please?