I Need To Get Out Of This Place

I know I'm just a teenager, and a confused one at that, but I look out my bedroom window and I feel like my soul doesn't belong in my body and my body doesn't belong in my house.
I'm a homebody, because my parents either don't trust me or don't trust the world enought o let me out frequently. I make a weekly trip to the library with my sister in the summer and I go to school the rest of the year, but other than that I live in my room. So I spend a lot of time lying on my bed and thinking, just trying to find myself and who I am and where I belong in this life.
And I just don't know.
Everywhere I can think of and all the glossy pictures in my books, the cultures I read about and the fantasy lands in novels, none of them seem like I belong there. So I create my own worlds. Worlds for me to live out of, because I just don't belong in the sleepy, suburban town I've grown up in.
I hope that maybe one day, I can run away. I can leave this town and everyone I know behind and start my search for the place that I'm meant to live in, but I just don't know. And I'm scared that I'll get up the courage to leave and I'll never find it, but after that I'll never be able to go back home.
So for now, I'll just have to try to be content with my fantasies and survive my last few years in this place. Afterall, there has to be a place for me somewhere . . . right?
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2 Responses Jul 23, 2011

i feel quite the same i practicly live in my room i go to school i come home and thats it untilo quite lately i had been able to go out with friends but thos privalages were taken away because of a situation my only social outlit has been taken away and they dont understand so your not the only one i understand :/

At your age, practically every feeling you have is too intense....<br />
<br />
Don't take this the wrong way, but seriously, if you found ANYTHING to do that would exhaust you (physically)... You might find a lot of these feelings would simply disappear....