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I Don't Belong On This Planet And I'm Waiting To Go Home

For as long as I can remember, I've always felt homesick no matter where I was. I always knew home wasn't here on Earth. Even as a child I'd watch people, how they interact with each other, examine their features, their behaviors, and I've wondered why I'm so different, why I don't even feel human. I act as human-like as possible, but everything I do is very different from everyone else. When I'm in physical pain, which has to be very strong because I'm very resistant, I laugh. Emotional pain, I numb all emotions.
I always want to be alone. I'm usually in my room, reading, writing, sleeping, gaming. Or at the library, where not even my parents can bother me. I have many friends, I just usually hang out with them at school, and I tend to come up with excuses to not hang out after school, because I'd much rather feel alone. But I think it's because I'm really not alone at all - I feel like there's always someone, one of my kind, with me in my heart. However, I still have the need to find my own kind physically.
I've always had an extreme fascination with the stars. I can spend hours and hours just staring off into them, admiring their beauty. When I do this it comforts me. I don't feel so alone in this world. But I scan the stars, like I'm searching for home, but I've forgotten exactly where it's at. I often get these extreme urges to go home. Lately they've been stronger than ever. I want to go back home, where I belong.
I have always been very mature for my age, but this isn't exactly a good thing. I have trouble with making friends. I am very intelligent, and often find myself correcting my instructors and teachers, but I don't always apply myself because my mind is always off elsewhere, exploring my own interests.
I also don't get close to people easily. I'm only close to two people, and I only love four. I don't really like people too much. But I'm very loving towards nature. Now, I'm not a tree hugger or anything, but any abuse to animals or plants gets me angry and I feel even more ashamed of humans. I'm a fighter, not a lover. I love to fight - but it competition. I'm the only female in my martial arts class, as I have been for two years. I fight against older men in their twenties, thirties, and forties, and I'm in my early teens. Many people find this odd, but I have an extreme attraction to fighting, and I think there may be a purpose for that.
I feel emotions that I know many people have never felt before. I can tell exactly what someone is feeling by just looking at them - they can have a huge smile on their face, but inside I know they're unhappy. It's vice-versa for others. I can also tell nearly exactly what someone is thinking, or what they're going to say before they open their mouths, by looking at them and/or feeling the energy they're giving off.
If a UFO or strange aircraft landed before me, I'd be the one to run right to it. I've seen two strange aircraft near my home before. They both occurred at night. The first time, I followed it into a pasture, but then something told me to run away. I hesitated, but I ran away. The second time I chased it and chased it until it disappeared. I wish I would've continued to chase it though... I want to go home...
I don't feel human. I don't belong on this Earth. I don't know my purpose for being here, and I know I have one. But I want to find my purpose so I can leave as soon as possible. I want to go home. If anyone feels this way, I'm begging you to message me... I want to go home, I need to find my own kind..
Insanityynk Insanityynk 13-15, F 67 Responses Dec 22, 2012

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You need to read up on starseeds. Please do. I want to go home too.

I feel the exact same way and I feel like everything has lost point, I can't even join coversations anymore I only observe and I can tell most people when they talk are setting themselves up for conflict and I want to leave and be with more people that get it. I'm glad I'm not the only one.

We are here. :) I almost cried when I read this, it's like reading my own journal. You are not alone. Don't forget this.

Yea...I think there are many of us who are starting to remember our origin...I for one know for a fact...

Oh my goodness, you are a starseed! I was just doing research on this and I came upon your story, I have your answer. Try learning about Starseed. I believe you have a connection to this.

You're right!!! I was thinking the exact same thing! I'm so glad to have read this. I almost cried reading her story.

Just find you, and you are not the only one. For years since I could remember as a child looked the starts with a feeling they left me here. And deep in me someone told me to wait. I am here to see something. Still waiting , when I was a child I could remember places clearly, strange language wich o still remember few, writings , when I started school I was giving a book talking about cuneiform writing and to my surprise all the letter I wrote , leaving them in places outdoor for "them" to find was really close, when I turn 10 I started to forget a sadness came to me because I knew, my memories were leaving me and someone was always close to me I name her NiN. She even told me her name , was her to protect me and care for me until 10. Years old. I feel so alone , I can interact with the wold, people parents always afraid someone would find my truth

I feel it as well. My mind never stops. Its like I'm constantly calculating the out come of everything around me. Always thinking up contraptions i could build with my busy life style i never get around to doing. I feel like the world i was brought up to live in is a lie and I'm here to do something but I dont know what it is. I'm still waiting to know. One day it will be my day.

You are not alone.

I feel like I am different than everyone around me. ever since I was a child I have been curious, looking around at social interactions between my family members their friends and their families and wondering why I could never find or be a part of that feeling, that feeling of bliss and security. I'm often alone because of this fact. I wander through my thoughts and truly find that I m forever searching 4 a place where I can be myself and not be judged but celebrated and loved for who I am. I'm 25 years old and the one person who truly loved me is gone and even he could not understand me but has protected me and loved me as his kin. I feel so trapped in this society where people are forevre mmultiplying and I just can't shake the feeling that I am here on this earth 2 Trenton whatever it is that has weakened me but I feel like I'm in the wrong place my emotions are so strong for people and its just never returned. It's more like there is an interference between me and the human race. No matter how hard I try to do good, I feel like I am a burden I am A space of energy in this world. I don't know why I am here. I don't know what my next move should be and if that move will finally make me feel whole. I feel like I will always feel alone and unprotected by anyone anymore. Where is this journey supposed to take me? Is this a fate that I have brought on myself?

strengthen not Trenton lol sorry

I know exactly how you are, except for the strange aircrafts and i cant tell what people are going to say, But i had these dreams sometimes, and when i woke up the next day when i went to school, the exact same thing happened as it did in the dream. Some quick facts about how i am: I'm always in my room, nearly no friends, Only 1 or 2 real friends, i feel like i cant trust anyone, I like being alone but sometimes i feel scared, i love nature, i feel like everything in this world is fake (except for nature), i looove learning about the stars and the universe and looking at them. I Cant seem to find anymore facts about me...

I love how there is hate, well.. I can tell you that what I just read was like reading my own thought's and if I were to have written it then it would have been word for word. lately it has been worse, I can feel it in my heart and in my mind. I have had dreams that do not make sense, everyday I am looking at the stars for hours and wondering why I feel safe, like there's someone watching me knowing I'm looking, searching, like they know I know. It doesn't make any sense.. I can assure you I have tried to live this life but this world rejects me! I am not crazy and live a normal life for my age and have fun but this is not it! everyday I am waiting for the stars, infact even during the day I look up and feel it, it's like I know there's someone out there that know's.. The stars have been changing lately and I do not know why, I look for signs in the stars, signs that this really isn't where I am from. for some reason I seem to be stupidly good at everything I do and excel quickly, but get bored of it just as fast. as soon as I have acheived what I wanted from it I move on and find myself wanting and pursuing many different carrers/hobbies. I alway's feel lost, no matter where I am or who I am with, when I lay back and listen to my own thought's I know that I am different to the people around me.. It's hard to explain but if I am crazy I would love to know why other feel the exact same way, not just a little but the exact same ******* thing! it makes no sense.. also I do detect emotion, I find anger hard to deal with and I can only deal with it by reacting the same way, I try to help others when they are down because I feel there pain and just want them to be better yet in retuen they wouldn't bother with me. I hate the fact that I can feel other's emotions and almost know exactly what they are thinking.. reading that post made me feel amazing because I realise it's not just me and I'm not crazy after all.. you are a sister or a brother, but know that I myself feel exactly the same way as you do! you wouldn't believe how alike we are! try and get intouch with me if you can #.. anyone.. we got here, we can get away from here. there has to be a way

Hi I feel the same way I don't know y but I know I am different I have always known this. I am meant for a great purpose I just wont to know what for I need to get up to the stars. That
I am sure of.

They might not have been going to your home. I believe there are many galaxies out there. My home is where Jesus is. Heaven is my home I too have never felt like I belonged here... I know i don't....But until it is my time I am going to try to love as many ppl and help as many I can help until it is time to go. Until then I remain READY to GO HOME,

then get like e. mf'n t. n phone ya zzz home

That's rude! you are too blind to see what is going on in this world, you are the nut, because you are not seeing the real world for what it is, I think you have a better purpose on earth then to post what you just wrote, and your time should be spent researching about the real world, because you are obviously in your own world. WAKE UP!!!

Feel the same for as long as I can remember. It is the same with me on sensing emotions. But one thing I know, is that we are not human or any other kind of being. These are just suits we put on the play the games and we have many many avatars. There is only one spirit and we are that! I know this but yet often feel as you do. Lonely and longing for family, for that connection. If you are here, this is your purpose, to live here an play. The connection is there, we just can't always feel it. There is only One and we can't ever be alone.

What do we do??? I have felt so alone because I want so much to be with others that are like me, though I find this site very comforting, everyone is still so distant, I wish there was a monthly event where we all could just get together and just share our experiences, I know that is not possible.

why are there so many of us that feel this? I feel better knowing that I am not the only one feeling this and why is it stronger than ever lately and suddenly everyone is coming out saying they feel the same way?

People tell me, it is because I am depressed, I hate when they say that, I know it is not depression or depersonalization. I am so tired of feeling this way, and just to know others feel the same way, really doesn't help, because there are no answers and that is what I am looking for.

me too.. believe me, we all feel the same way but with no answer as to why! I have searched and searched but theres nothing that will make it any better! IO just want to know why! :(

Have you ever felt a message. Says to wait , that "We" need to watch s something to see ,

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I feel the same way. I have no idea what planet I am from. But I know I am not from earth i am a Alien of some kind i can't remember. But my feeling in my bones tell me I might be A Nordic or A New Being who was created.

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I have always felt that way but later on in life I learn that God was the only one who could make me understand why I felt the way I did. I didn't understand why I could feel what other people felt or even see things that other people can't see. I learned that home is not on earth this is just temporary. Home one day will be with the lord. But for now earth is home until Jesus comes. God is amazing and powerful when you except Jesus you will find who you are and understand yourself. Being different is beautiful. I have children that are like me and I do understand what they are feeling and going through. I have so many stories and I can even write a book on the things that have happened in my life that many that are like me would understand. Trust me when I tell you God is the only way you will find yourself. Read the kings James bible.

This so true ycruz72, everyday I ask GOD to give me my purpose on earth, I feel like I am waiting for an assignment of my next move, because nothing else interest me, I feel anxious to start my work, whatever it is. I just have to be patient.

Very beautiful indeed, there is no other way to put what you have said into different words, God is the only way to find yourself, I feel like we have to wait and be patient on the LORD, because he will not move when we want him to, I know first hand about this, because I am going through it now. Thank You for you encouraging words, just had to let you know I read what you said, and it did not get ignored.

I'm a 17year old female... Well here at least. I remember my name... Somehow. And I somewhat remember what I'm doin here... I'm getting overly bored as I'm wasn't and will probably never be the type to just sit and study as I'm supposed to. I'm a combatant type, not an intellectual. I do not feel/know most feelings which seem normal to others. I remember how to fight, despite not having any previous martial arts training, and my friend says I have a different aura... Well, if anyone wants to chat, please email me @ ZepthArgonstein@gmail(dot)com

Will be lookin forward to any emails:) I'll be willin to tell more about myself, if I can answer. But probably not most of your questions as I doubt we came from the same place. But at least we're in the same situation.

Same I can tell how people are feeling and thinking

Hi I feel simular to you,, Since I was 2 years old I kept teling my family and people around me that I was not from here, and I was not from this world,, everybody laughed at me and use to think im joking,, im highly telepathic , Every time I start thinking about someone strongly they usually ring me or tex me within minutes,, '' and I normaly know what people are thinking to.. Love to talk to you Insanityynk,, To talk to someone of my kind I believe will give me answers to some Questions,, Vik

Strange we all some telepathic, source, vision, ghostly I can see not afraid of dying but now am attached for the people I am leaving behind

So my im a 23 year old male and ive constantly felt this way since i can remember . most of the things your saying blows my mind to find out that someone else feels this way. I always find myself staring at the sky at night and i cant say why which is weird ... I promise im being 100 % percent honest !!

Please, if you ever find the way to return home i hope you will find me and take me with you, i ave always thought that my parents were not my real ones, and that i was put on this earth for a purpose, i also have a friend that i connected with when i was in nursery, which is where toddlers go its a kind of school, anyway i met him there and i have been 'best friends' with him all my life, i am 17 now and we still see each other frequently, he has a good nature just like me, i have been searching for the knowledge that is hidden within me all my life and im so interested with extraterrestrial beings and things, at least i have found this...i feel connected and not so alone as a sit in my room by myself, i can feel energy from people, i know exactly how they are feeling, and i know when something isn't going to work.

This is strange,but i sorta feel that way 2,well except the whole being smart thing,i do average in school,but i do feel like i can look at stars for long times and then i get this overwhelming feeling of..i dont know what to even call it?i dont relate well to shy..i dont like to talk...i love animals,specially horses,i find that something is missing from my life..but idk what to believe anymore(i am christian,and i do however believe that God really does exsist and that he has got a plan for me)

I'm loud and outspoken. So is my immediate family. I try to care for what others say, buy I donnot. I listen always listen. Not nuxh k7xh stamds out these days. But more than evee stands out these days. If that makes sense .. I'm soon to wed after 30 years. Of life. Hasn't happened yet but somehow I know it will. Who is this man that evens my field. Wh
o's life am I living to even a score...? As I write I feel I know not what I speak. I feel a loss of who I once was ....

I am german yet speak in many accents. How? I know not.. juat enough that I know I am an observer.

I had to create an account just to respond to this. I'm single, but I know that I will get married some day, despite never wanted to in my previous years. I also know that my first child will be a girl.

I have always felt that way.I feel like an Observer than a Participant in everything.I'm very intelligent but have never applied it to studies or work.
Why am I here?
So no, you are not alone in feeling that way.I'm 52 yo by the way.

First time I don't feel alone or like a complete freak thank you for sharing <3

Ive been on this site, just reading for a while. Actually mostly weirded out by some of the things people post. I dont even have the energy to post anything myself ive never been one to put myself out there. and only until i typed into google i dont belong did your post show up. Im grateful to have found it. Still feel alone in a room full of people because they just dont get it but to know there are people like me is comforting none the less.

i feel and act exactly the same. moving from country to country lately i have an extremely intense of feeling of wanting to go home. but i cannot figure where is it. i like to be closed down in my room and have extremely strong sense of purpose, cant tell how people think, what do they feel, who are they. but when it comes to myself, i cannot figure who i am.

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I understand exactly where you are coming from, and I know it is hard to talk about it to people who don't understand. you are not alone.