Mourning A Childhood Lost

I spent most of my childhood trying to survive, so I feel like I never got to experience any of the fun things that make up childhood. I didn't have any friends or get to play much. I was an outcast at school and bullied a lot. I find myself now wanting to play like a little kid.
my boyfriend has two little girls and they love me and I find myself playing make believe and having tea parties, and I really have fun while I'm with them. it's like I am a little girl. They even say I'm like a little kid. actually everyone who knows me seems to think this. and I think it's true, I didn't have a chance to grown up so I'm still a kid in a sense.
It makes me sad though because I really feel I missed out on being a child. I can't go out and play in the dirt and run a muck since I'm an adult now. I really want to play hide and seek. lol that seems kind of silly but little things like that are more precious than gold.
Cherflu Cherflu
31-35, F
Nov 29, 2012