Well I'm back!!! I was doing so well on my self love journey. I was trying to improve many areas in my life.

I had hope and little by little it's going away. I'm trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel but it seems like it's getting further away and I'm afraid that it will disappear.

My past post were so sad. Then they started to get more inspirational and then they showed my intellectual side... I was on a roll to building up my confidence.

Then I hit a bump in the road and I'm close to starting all over again. But the thing about starting all over again is that each time it's get a little harder to build up the strength to start over and in the past I have completely stop. To completely stop is a scary place to be in if you never been there you never want to go there.. So I'm praying I don't stop... Because literally for me stopping means staying in bed 24/7 not being able to move a finger barely eating or taking caring of myself.... Not speaking to none one. Not even having the strength or concern to watch tv... Just existing. Shutting myself out completely from the world.

How could a person feel so bad???
toniyl toniyl
41-45, F
2 Responses Jul 11, 2015

I can relate. I thought I saw the light at the end of the tunnel, but as it turned out, it was just someone with a candle that burned out when I was too deep in to find my way back out.

Exactly the way I was feeling... Thanks for understanding

you must keep yourself busy always, add new things to your list & try them.