I Seem Unhappy And Apparently Complain All The Time

ok where do i start with this? i work and live out side of my own country, i got married this year and then my wife lost her job. i had a job that used to consume me and all of my time but have now started in a new job. it hasnt started the best because i am working 7 days per week and the company are not offering a good enough salary to hire trained staff members which is why i left my old job. i am constantly having to put the things i need on hold because of the situation i find my self in and i never have money to get things that i would like for my self like a car to travel to work and then have to rely on my wife untill i can find some one who i can pay to give me a lift each day untill i manage to get the money together for my own car. i have gained some weight mainly due to the hours i have worked over the past three years and cant seem to find the time to even try to work out in the gym in my building. i have a very short fuse and seem to get annoyed with some staff i have worked with in the past and i am worried i might bring this to my new place of employment. i just dont feel like i am living the life i should be and im so tired of having to work with people who are incompetent when it comes to doing their job. i guess the way i am acting is more aless my fault and my wife constantly tells me i should try to be more positive which makes me angry because i feel i am the one who always has to make things right in order for us to live the life we are living. im fed up and some times dont realise that this is the way i am acting. dont know what to do really but i know i have to just keep going...... dont know if i will get a reply to this and im not sure why i am writing it maybe some one might be able to help me make sense of how im feeling or why im feeling like this. i know it seems pretty obvious a bad run of luck in life i guess and things will get better i have heard this before but nothing has changed yet so i guess im acting the way i am because im unhappy.... if only my wife could understand this when she tries to give me advice even though im the one holding it all together.
frenchdub frenchdub
1 Response Sep 21, 2012

Hello, I think it takes a lot of courage to be so open about how you feel. I will try to be honest with my reply. I think living away from the Country you originally lived in must be difficult.Our family and friends, who know us well, can be our greatest support and sounding boards, in difficult times. Have you thought about moving back home? If not, it may be worthwhile giving this some serious thought and consideration, especially if you have a strong support network there.
Also, it seems to me you have experienced a lot of life changes this year, marriage, job changes, job losses, weight gain all combined are very big stress inducers. Losing your temper is a big sign all is not well. Try not to be so hard on yourself. It seems to me you have coped and are coping with an extreme amount of pressure. Have you ever credited yourself for this? If not, why not?
If moving back home is not an option, then it seems to me your life, currently, is not one you enjoy. Your job does not seem to give you the fullfilment you need. Does every day seem the same? Do you see the days melting into one? Do you look ahead and see nothing changing? Could that be the reason for the way you feel ? If so what can you do about it? Have you thought about writing a list of all the things you would like to change? If so, how could you do it? It may take time, it won't happen overnight but if you feel overwhelmed, you can reassure yourself that you are making steps to change your situation.
Plus look at what you do have, a wife, a marriage, your physical health, possibly? A job, yes it may not be your ideal one but your employer see's your potenial. Your young, please talk to your wife and tell her how you feel, write it down if you have to, get it off your chest. It is a strength if you can ask for help and see how people react, I'm here and I don't know you. Imagine how people will help who do know you. How would you feel if someone asked you for help? Would you help them? Imagine how you would react if someone helped you. You have helped me, I feel sad and despondant right now, it will pass, it always does, I will feel happier, I always do. I have to sit with myself till this passes and know hand on heart it will. It is a lovely world look for the love in it. God bless.