Looking For Hope

Hi Everyone,
I'm 21 years old and have suffered from depression and anxiety for several years.
It's strange - some days I feel as though I have found the answer and the end to my inner conflict, but many days I just don't feel like it's worth it to try. Sure there are people that love me, need me; I have a role in life, but where do I fit in the big picture? More importantly, what is the big picture and is it crucial for me to suffer in this life and not just be done with it?
I've never been religious, I often feel that if I was it would take care of many of my issues. I have a critical mind and find it impossible to stop searching and just accept what I do not know. What was the secret of those critical minds before me? Philosophers, artists, scientists: how did they find the motivation to use their talents in this world and accept the challenge provided by the suffering that comes with human life? Positivity only goes so far, and there are deep rooted questions in me that burn all the time.
I would hope that I am not alone in this struggle and would love if someone could share their story about how they overcame it. Thanks and may peace always be in your heart!
Orengezombie Orengezombie
18-21, F
2 Responses Jan 19, 2013

I think your questioning will lead you to your right path. I too am a critical thinker. I am enjoying the study of various spiritual paths and the one most logical, fascinating and fulfilling is the study of Buddhism.

You simply sound like an individual with above average intelligence to me. I'm not exactly over my own obstacles, but I'm well on my way. I think it is different for all great minds on what exactly allowed them to do such wonderful things for the world to appreciate. Many of them created those things when they were in their later years after much study as well. Keep your head up, and your mind sharp.