Do You Feel Like An Alien!?

I feel like i'm an outsider. I dont feel like im real or connected to the world. Depersonalisation is waht they call it i think... but hey whats a term when its an existence! i've just got a new girlfriends dumped me and i'm head is in a serious mess and i'm really scared. i feel like i cant tell anyone and that know one really understands me and what im about. this is not a new thing its been throughout my whole life. sometimes i wonder if its all worth it. the pain and the beauty in the whorld just makes me want to cry all the time. i pretend to be 'normal' but i cant do it anymore. im nothing like 'normal' people. it seems so easy for them. its like a constant struggle for me. if anyone feels the same as me please comment!x
scaredtobehere scaredtobehere
29 Responses Feb 15, 2008

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I understand what you are going through, I feel so disconnected from my family and everyone else I meet. I feel like I am not suppose to be in the body I am in, and I feel like I don't belong here. It is very depressing. I often pray that I can find people like myself who understands what I am feeling.

Oh yes, many similarities. Though I could not relinquish my emotionalism knowing it was part of my difference. I've since discovered that music is an enormous part of how I communicate, as though it must be the same in the place I come from. So, too, with mathematics (not sung!) though I never got along with math types, geek types, or just about any other "type" I met in all the fields I've come into contact with. Have always been criticized for my super sensitivity. Many tried to pressure me out of it but again, I would not let go. I, too, rarely talk about this feeling of being from elsewhere. I usually just say I don't fit in or need lots of alone time. I don't feel uncomfortable with the humanoid body so I figure it's something similar to where I really belong. Probably that has made it all the more difficult as I look at others here and expect them to be in synch with me. They never are. Even how I go about courting is different. So much touch and gazing is required before the usual sexual expressions. No one gets that, either. I can say it's hard as hell here and it only gets more so as the years pass. Oh, and on that issue, I make a sharp distinction between chronological aging (which means little to me) and living, where as the culture places a premium on chronological age. I laugh at that, find it foolish and a waste.

It's been 5 years since you initially posted, but I hope you've been doing well.
Since I was a child, I felt outside of things - more like an observer or a scientist performing social experiments, than a participant. I was able to see human relationships objectively, and developed a social camouflage that is now almost second-nature to me. One of the greatest experiential gaps I found was in regard to Death and Tragedy. While others panicked or fell apart in the face of these things, I remained level-headed, and experienced it 'differently'. To fit in during these times, I learned to keep my mouth shut, so I wouldn't say something considered inappropriate. If prompted to speak on such occasions, I would look off distantly with a look of sadness or repeat something I'd heard someone else say - but I still haven't mastered the social scripts for these seemingly important events. Also regarding death, while most all people fear "The Reaper", I find myself only hoping that I don't run out of time before I accomplish my missions in life.
Also, like you, I spent most of my early life feeling the joy and beautiful bitterness of the Universe with a great intensity (such as in the previously mentioned instances of Tragedy). When puberty hit, this was intensified to the point of psychosomatic torture; at which point, I decided to take control through meditation and focus exercises. After a time, I learned to tune down most of my emotional responses, and only let myself feel so intensely when I really want to - so most of the time, I'm almost perfectly level (except the rare occasions where matters of the heart override all of my controls, for a while). I think this is attainable by anyone, but few have much motivation to do so (as I'm sure you've noticed that the great majority of human beings are happy to be led around by their endocrine system).
As for your experience of this phenomenon, I hope that you've already figured out the advantages and learned to embrace it.

I definitly feel the same. I typed in almost that same line, and got here.

its so good to hear that im not alone i have felt that way for a long time.

I understand what you mean, I was the one trying to fit in when I was a kid. Didn't work, I didn't feel understood nor understood them.
Eventually I found out that I'm just fine on my own. I'm a lot more selective now, and I only approach them if it's absolutely necessary. I have a few friends that are more like brothers to me (few = 2). You know what's the funny thing? Once you start focusing on yourself and get to evolve, personally and intellectually you will find these same kinds of people trying to connect with you, it's your choice after that to either give them some of your time or just leave them behind. I have found out that some times you can get something from them, some others it's just a waste of time.
To sum up... don't spend to much time trying to link with them, that just make them go further away, instead, enjoy your time and use it to develop yourself, they will come on their own, and if you need them just use them.

Same :(

I feel the same way... My entire life I have always felt like I was an alien, like I didn't belong.. I wish I knew where I really came from.. I have no ambition for a life in this world, everything is so materialistic.. I see humans as something that I am not, I watch and analyze people. I don't connect with them. I agree that they are living their lives too simply. I can't believe that there are other people int he world that feel like I do. what are we here for?? im so amazed that i stumbled upon this, i dont feel so alone.

I feel and see you :)

In second grade, I remember looking at all of the kids playing on the playground and knowing: "I am not a part of this....I dont belong here." I have felt that way ever since and even more so now. I am now approaching my 50th birthday. I have been married (more than once) and have two beautiful children and grandchildren. I had a psychic tell me that Im not from "here" (Earth) and that neither of my sons are from here either. One of my sons seemed to already know this and expressed this to me before he was four years old. Now, here I am getting ready to celebrate my 50th birthday and guess what? I still feel the same as I did when I was in second grade....I dont belong here; I dont fit in; I'll never fit in now and I will never, EVER understand these people....not sure at this point that I want to fit in anyway. That's not to say I dont feel emotions and I dont love.....I do, but it seems I have a much deeper and intense sense of integrity and an agopic sort of love and most of those individuals surrounding me are astonishingly more "shallow". I have tried every different approach I can think of to fit in....they just dont seem to get it, nor do I get them.
I give up. I have recently become depressed and I give up trying to understand and fit in. I have a twin sister and she doesn't feel this way. In fact, she ostracised me claiming I am of the devil...mainly because of events I seem to know of beforehand.

I dont know what the answer is but I am convinced that there is some unseen or unrevealed information that might help fill in the HUGE blank I am feeling (and have felt) in an intense fashion throughout my ENTIRE life. No, killing myself, no matter how much I may not want to wake up in the morning, feels very wrong to me. I feel like I am waiting, but I dont know what for. I have had bloodwork and psychiatric evaluations performed; there was nothing remarkable found so no, no vitamin deficiency of B or whatever will "cure" me. Still waiting.....and convinced more than ever that there is something behind the scenes that has not been revealed to me. Selfishly glad to know that I am not alone in something that I now realize I have incorporated into my personal identity. I'd say God Bless but no longer sure that's THE reality.

I feel like an alien in my work life, my marriage , sometimes with my friend relationships and also don t know where i want to live. I always have work and have no problem getting a job but slowly dissatifaction sets in and i just want to escape. I don t use drugs, only drink socially so on the outside I seem pretty normal. I am conservative yet am not afraid to express myself anyway I want. My kids ( which is 1 area i am satisfied) say I am a pretty decent mom. I just don t know where to go from here. I dont like to complain so I dont let pthers know how crappy i really feel since i know everyone live their own hardships. Nat

Yeah like feeling like you dont want to be here, and you want to go somewhere else, but you dont know where. At least that's how I feel. I've seriously been considering living in another country, but I dont know if it would make it worse... ??

I'm 18 and feel like this. I feel like an alien, I don't belong with my friends. Its a small group and they say we are all close, but I feel like they aren't and they get mad at me for telling them that which makes everything worse. They too have problems, everyone does. But ever since I was little I always felt alone. Isolated from the world, family included. I've only just recently started to express my feelings, I keep my emotions locked up. I've noticed mood swings have been going on for a while and I remember always being depressed, but not thinking I was. I thought it was a phase...that was when I was 14. I feel it has only gotten worse and I think I may be bipolar...something is wrong in my head.

hey i feel the same way i feel like that i am a ghost and nobody now's who i am or what i do i feel like i want to drown and die in the lake and be stuck in between two rocks and im only 12 but when i feel alone i don't now why but i always read a book when i feel like this i kind of get relax..... but that's my way to get over all my feeling do something you like live your life like you want and i hope that all the people there feeling like this be HAPPY

i sort of know what your on about, whenever im at school i feel like i never belong with my friends i feel so out of place, i am never comfortable around another person i always feel the need to pretend to be 'normal' when really my life is full of people i just always feel alone, one of a kind i guess... i have had no traumatic or stressful events to bring on this feeling as im only 13 i have always felt like i need to be alone, but yet im so upset when theres no one around... i even feel like this with my family..

No person can actually completely understand anyone.... it's impossible. I hope you find someone that does a good job at trying though. Best of wishes

I do have depersonalisation for 10 years now, but I have to tell you people sOmething... never give up!!!!! LIVE LIFE , LOVE YOUR SELF, THINK OF THE SIMPLE THINGS YOU LOVE, FEEL PROUD OF YOURSELF, TAKE ON A NICE HOBBY, START EXERCISING, SLEEP EARLY, LET YOUR BRAIN REST, TAKE SOME GOOD SUPPLEMENTS! OMEGA3 AND VITAMINS B, and some RHODIOLA! be optimistic please!!!<br />
never say that you will have this forever, then you have it win you, its a thing that happened in our brains when we panicked and got very depressed with something , that's what it is and its fixable, its not like HIV or cancer, so let loose of anxiety pleaseeee!!! <br />
I know that it is all in our minds, and I know that it will dissapear one day, yes, it will, it is caused by a chemical imbalance, as researchers say our dopamine is in lower doses than normal people. I have had it for years then disappeared for 3 years and came back, because of my panick attack, Sometimes I feel dumb my memory is so bad, and I feel like an alien... but sometimes it gets really better... I know its a matter of time,<br />
so try this therapy and dont even think about it, persuade yourself that its something silly and it grows only because you aknowledge its existence..<br />
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trust me on this--- THIS THING it is curable!

Maybe we, just think too deeply, or others too shallow. If you express your true thoughts- you get stares or worse , suddenly ignored. My first realization of this is when I was six and told a lady at a park about my sister dying of Luekemia a few months before and how I missed her. She'd been my friend, my "little Mama", my playmate.( My Dad was in the Air Force and I was shy, it made making friends hard to do.-so my sister had been my everything!.) My Mom reminded me years later. She said that I told that ladyat the park about Karen and then I said " And Mama ,she did'nt even cry" After that I never even mentioned ever having a sister. I was in high school when one of my best friends saw a portrait of my sister and asked who she was, My mother told her and the friend said I'd never mentioned her.- And that's why! Perhaps we are observers meant to see the world but not necessarily participat in it. I found my soul mate-but he was not handsome, so I did not act .I married someone else . He is a wonderful person, but does not "get"me. Sometimes he looks at me lke I have two heads when I try to explain myself. I have again learned not to show my feelings. <br />
Better Luck for the rest of you! We are different , embrace it and prepare for the next world. There--- who knows, we may be the "NORM".

Every human feels like this deep down because life is confusing and strange. Humans are raised to be "good citizens" and are pushed into education from an early age which is the very start of years of social conditioning. Human beings have much more potential than they imagine, but easily are persuaded to act a certain way. It's only a matter of time the feeling of Emptiness arises and questions and feelings of your place on earth commences. Once you start asking yourself about your meaning and purpose then you will never stop as there are no answers to these questions. Life can be wonderful but is equally horrible and takes the human mind to dark and unknown places. Please be aware that doctors will try and tell you your ill and have psychological problems if you were to say you feel scared or different and that you feel like an outsider, but please ignore as there are endless possibilities in the existence of everything. Maybe you are just different for a reason as why would you want to fit in with the conditioned societies on earth?

Put away your platitudes. You have been socialized to blindly encourage and comfort people, but you clearly have no idea of what the few are feeling - so your words only re-prove the existence of this experiential gap.

God is whispering in your souls, you see, you all were meant to become Christs, saviours of this evil and corrupt world, there are none but me, who can show you the path to your Christ, once you begin this journey your sense of despair will begin to go away and the world will hate you and you will know the deeper you, the God you...come to me. You are different. <br />
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i have been feeling like this for a year now i just want to feel likeme again

Whenever I see someone like you type away, the same way I typed a similar feeling, it makes me want to fly away and make a new planet suited for people like us, I dont hate this world but sure dont belong here

ur not alone

i can relate. I feel like the things that i go through are so crappy that no one understands me. I'm the type of person that people think is not normal. But, you know what? Who cares, you should just be yourself, and you will find people who are just like you or someone you can talk to about all of this. Trust me when i say time is everything. You just got to take one day at a time.

i feel the same as if theres no one in the world that understands you as if theres no one in the world like you you try to tell people but they dont get it i try to open up to my friends and they think im weird people even call me phyco their just ignorant to you and its their loss

Dont worry. I feel like that every day, like im an outsider. But i try to get along with everyone but its hard. and yes this world is beatufil and ugly.

i completely know how you feel, i have been living with monster!!! (depersonalisation) for 4 years, and is Horrible! you are right what you are saying and i believe you completely what you are saying. It is so hard for explain to people how you feel because it the strangest feeling ever, to me it feels like i am in a jam jar and the world and everyone is on the outside. Try to be strong and if you to talk i am here.

totally. totally feel that way. just got divorced, and i get where youre coming from. i wish i had some wisdom for you but i dont. i think the best ive gotten is to try to stop being afraid, other people can sense and thats why they act weird around me. easier said than done.

hey, this is my first comment, but yea. i can really sympathize with you. Everything you posted, i contemplate EVERY day. Im a Christian, so Im not going to kill myself, but sometimes i want to. It seems highly unlikely that i will ever find someone like me or that I could love enough to marry. Do you have any dreams? Like what would be your ideal future?