I don't just feel like no one understands me, I know that no one understands me. It's so hard being in this family, in this school, in this world. My family invalidates my feelings, don't think the same way I do, I can talk to them about anything without being undermined, ignored or misunderstood. My friends don't even understand me, I've never been good at showing my true self so I show what people want to see because when I am myself no one likes me. They think I'm weird... Which I am but why is it a bad thing?
I don't even understand myself anymore, I don't know why I do things or say things. It's like I'm not in control sometimes. I get sad or mad and say mean things or I get really happy and do crazy things... Sometimes I'm fine with how I am and am proud but other times I just want to scream and cry and wish to be normal.
Today was just another example of no one understanding. A kitten I rescued died while if was at school, my dad said I should have just taken her to the pound when I found her. But they would have just put her down anyway in a cruel manner. He said that I had done it anyway. It wasn't my fault she died she was sick when I found her and she wasn't responding to medicine. My siblings done care my mother understands I'm sad but nothing else. I went to a friend's house to get away from the family but we ended up fighting and I left it on bad terms. I feel bad but also indifferent right now. And I don't know why
I wish I had just one person in my life, that really understood me. A few internet friends do but they can't help me when I'm feeling like this and won't log on. Nor can I get a hug, something I really need right now but will never get
secretlyfelix secretlyfelix
22-25
1 Response Sep 16, 2014

I know how you feel. You feel left out, no one to talk to when u need them the most. I know how it is to be ignored or misunderstood. I am also not good showing my true self, but at time it just comes out when u least aspect it to. Don't think that no one likes u. You don't need to put yourself down. A way I try to put myself up is listening to music, doing something I love, or just looking up quotes that inspire me to do better in my life. But u never want to put yourself down. You need to think positive things and not negative ones. You will understand yourself one day, even I still don't understand me. Everyone all over the world has been through something similar like yours. You are normal, don't let any one tell u different. One of the qoutes I like is don't let ANYONE dull your SPARKLE.