I Feel Lost Without My Mum

My wonderful mum died June 2nd 2009, she was diagnosed with stomach cancer and died eight weeks later. I feel that I have lost half of my life and I miss her every day. I was on my way to see her the day that she died, I had to drive 120 miles, she was at home and she was responding to the chemo, but that morning she became very ill and very weak and my dad called for an ambulance. by the time they had arrived my mum was slipping away and she died when they arrived at the hospital. I didn't know she was so ill and when I arrived at her house I got a phone call from my son to say that she had died. at that moment my whole world fell apart, all I could do was scream with the devastation and I didn't know what to do. My screams where heard by one of my mums neighbors who rushed out to see what was wrong, he was wonderful and he took me to the hospital to see her. when I got there I could not believe that she was dead, it was devastating to see her beautiful body lying there, she looked so innocent and she was warm. I couldn't believe that this wonderful person was gone, how could I ever live without her? Eight months on and the pain is so hard to bare, every day seems to last forever. All I want to do is to talk to her again, I want to tell her that my first grand child is on its way and that she is going to be a great grandmother, but she's not here is she and I have no one to talk to anymore. I miss you mum so much and will love you for an eternity.

shaunti shaunti
41-45, F
Feb 16, 2010