Is There Life Out There?

I am 58 years old, was married 31 years to a woman chaser and heavy drinker. I was married at the ripe age of 17. Very bad choice! Didn't HAVE to get married, but back in "69" it was the thing to do. I had 3 great kids. My oldest and I have not gotten along since her father and I were divorced. That's ok. I still have 2 other kids who do love me. At the time of my divorce I was also taking care of my Mom who was dying at the age of 68 to cancer. After she passed, the family crumbled. So I actually was going through two losses at the same time. My Ex left..no money, no car, I had to move out of my home.

After two years of random dating, I met a man ( through a mutual friend) who had also gone through a divorce after being married 33 years. We were together for 2 years before I agreed to marry him. I should have been more cautious when he told me many times he would always look after his "Mother" till she died. They have a very, very, tight relationship. She has always disliked me, why? Because I took her son away from her. She has been plotting to break us up since day one, and when there is a confrontation, well....mama is always right and I am wrong.

With what little money I got from my divorce, I bought a trailer. Hubby number 2 had a job, a good one, but, because the economy got bad, he was let go. He is now back at the job, which is good. We couldn't make the lot rent, and before I knew it...literally... it was planned that we were going to live in MAMA's  basement. Not good at all!!! Mama thinks she should know all our business, which she does, because sonny boy tells her everything...even before I know details. I am always the last one to know.  In April, after being put down, and put down, she got mad at me over a dozen eggs!! I admit, I lost my cool, and called her a Biatch.... I meant it. Since then, I am not allowed up stairs, cannot sit on her front porch, nor back deck. She is telling everyone, family and friends, and "the town's gossip club" the she is AFRAID of me! I have never hurt anyone in my life! I am not a violent person at all. This is so embarrassing to me and so very untrue. Yet, hubby just shrugs his shoulders. Hubby always questions my word, he likes to boss me, he tells me how to cook, belittles me infront of people..he thinks it's funny.

I am currently unemployed...been looking, but at my age, and with no degree, no one wants a 58 year old woman to work for them when there are much younger and educated people out there. I would leave, but have no where to go. My children have their own lives, and that would be a desperate situation before I would ask to stay with either one of them.

A few weeks ago, (Mother) decided to lock me in the basement. I can use the cellar stairs to get in and out..but once winter comes the snow will pile up on the doors...then what? Hubby of course is allowed to go up . I call living here The Cave.... which it is.

I guess I am looking for friendship, people to talk to. Someone ....
meekalynn meekalynn
56-60, F
1 Response Jul 21, 2010

Sounds to me like she is using you as her "doormat" to the cellar. It also sounds like "hubby" has a dark side he must of hid before you married him. No one has the right to belittle you EVER. Sounds like its time to leave MAMMA's house now that he is back to work!! I would set a time fr<x>ame (hopefully before the snow) on plans to become independant and start home shopping with hubby. Maybe when he is not under mammas roof his tie with her will not rule your life. Be brave and know you are not alone :)