A Little Overwhelmed

Lost...  It is not a good feeling for me.  I can understand being lost.  I've done that before.  I don't like that feeling much either.  I tends to make me feel panicky and otherwise stressed.  So to have that same feeling, where the surroundings are unfamiliar and nothing feels quite right, in a place that I know better than some people know their own homes is disorienting to say the least.

I can't help wondering what causes people to feel this way.  I know I'm not alone.  Even friends that I talk to face-to-face confirm similar experiences.  But no one seems to know why.  Why you can be having a completely normal day, yet suddenly and inexplicably feel completely out of place.  No where feels like home, no where feels right, yet you can't pinpoint any specific factor that makes everything feel wrong.  You're just lost.  In between feelings. 

And maybe if I was ever alone I could retreat to somewhere in my own mind to hide from these feelings or even to atempt a search for the answers.  But here I am.  Alone and lost while I'm surrounded by people in my hometown.  How can this be?

Oh well.  It's already time to put on my happy mask so I can get through what's left of the day without anyone noticing something is wrong.  If I wait much longer to hide it, I'll be stuck trying to explain to everyone that doesn't understand anyways.

cluelessandlost cluelessandlost
18-21, M
Feb 23, 2010