A Friend In Need Is A Friend In Need.

When I finally hear the stories of my friends. I'm shocked. I put my problems aside and try to help them before I do anything for myself.

I've got problems but I hide them away. I don't want others to be like me. I encourage them to open up and talk.
I don't want my friends to feel this way, I need them to be themselves. I suppose we all have demons. And sometimes the best of us have the most persuasive.
My problems are sometimes unfourtunatley obvious. But I've seen what it does to me and them and I don't want them to end up like me.
I instantly feel they're pain. See it from their view. Try and help them straight away. But sometimes I have to force myself to be objective so they can see it from a different angle. Because sometimes we're too blind to see whats in front of us.
I feel guilty for not seeing their problems. And then whilst they tell me I feel guilt for the thoughts I'm thinking about myself and how this might affect me. I should be there for my friends. Helping them get through life.
My problems are second rate compared to that. They help me when it becomes to much to hold in. But I don't know if I help them. I can't see it because they're all so much better than me. More composed, sensible, confident. I'm far from jealous because if I was jealous I'm sure I'd feel differently about them.

My friend made my cry last night. Just by letting it all out. He cried and I can't remember the last time he did that.
I was overwhelmed. I felt guilty and sad for him. He always puts on this front of being above it all. But the little things get to him, I see them but he's got an inner control that just helps him get through it.
I used to see him as an arrogant, selfish, loudmouthed *****.
He is and he'll admit to it, but at least he knows it. And if he was anything else I wouldn't like him.
So I stop thinking of myself and did everything to get him back. I don't want him to change, but if its for the better and it helps him then I'll do it.
AgeonAngel AgeonAngel
Aug 1, 2010