Rejection.

We've all been there. I know its true. But I can't handle it anymore. It's been too long and too many text messages saying "Lets just be friends." I don't know what it is that I do. I am an fine looking guy and I am a great listener. But I have been single for 2 years now and I hate it. But for tonight I just want to talk about the two most recent examples, both this month. I am not sure entirely why I am writing this or if anyone will even care. But I just don't know what else to do anymore...

On April 3rd I turned 20. And me and an old friend from highschool were hanging out and drinking about and we ended up kissing long into the night for several hours. It was pretty amazing. Possibly one of the best kisses I've ever gotten. And I wasn't sure what to think the next morning. I hadn't been interested in her since the beginning of highschool, but now all morning she was all I could think about. The next couple times I saw her we kind of acted like a couple, kissed, held hands and I took her out to eat a few times and such. And then one day she stops talking to me for a week, without any warning at all. I was very confused and a bit nervous because I thought I finally found a relationship to fall into. And finally after several days she comes to me and tells me shes gay. And I was her last attempt at dating guys. And It failed I suppose...

So I shrugged it off like I have always have in life and moved on, it sucked at first, but then a week later I met this girl in my Psychology class, we started talking and immediately hit it off. We went to dinner the second time we talked and walked around together until 3 in the morning and then she calls me the next morning and we talk for several hours again. I was really excited at how into this girl was into me. And then today she tells me that we should just be friends. I have no Idea why either. And it hurts like a *****. I can usually shrug it off and move on. but I am so tired of being "Just friends" that I don't know what to do anymore. I got really drunk earlier tonight because I just couldn't handle how miserable I felt (First time I've ever drinken the sorrows away).

So now here I am. Complaining to the world cuz I don't know what the hell else to do.
SenorFuzzeh SenorFuzzeh
18-21, M
2 Responses May 7, 2012

i am 18..and i have never been in a relationship..partly because of cultural obligations(live in an asian society),and well,majorly because no body ever asked....you can only imagine how low i might be on self esteem..what makes it all the more difficult is how my friends and family compliment me for being beautiful,intelligent,funny..yet no guy can see that in me,and that just confuses me a lot..
i was feeling terribly lonely tonight,and came across your story..i know how it feels..message me if you want to share something..

here is a song that resonates..

''You're reaching out
And no one hears you cry
You're freaking out again
'Cause all your fears
Remind you another dream has come undone
You feel so small and lost like you're the only one
You wanna scream 'cause you're
Desperate
You want somebody, just anybody
To lay their hands on your soul tonight
You want a reason to keep believin'
That someday you're gonna see the light
You're in the dark
There's no one left to call
And sleep's your only friend
Well even sleep
Can't hide you from all those tears
And all the pain and all the days
You wasted pushin' them away
It's your life, it's time you face it ”

I have a significant other and I'm very lonely. He takes me for granted and says my being so loving is annoying. He should b so lucky to have me. But he treats me like I'm nothing.