A Day In My Life. This Is Going To Be Very, Very Long.

I am constantly begging my fiance to help me around the house. Do anything, Dishes, a load of laundry, pick up after himself, take out the trash, ANYTHING. I never get any help from him or my mother whom lives with us, very sloppily I might add. I love them both dearly but tonight I snapped on him. He works from home, he has a pretty flexible, easy going job. Though he disagrees.

I grew up in a house where whoever cooks doesn't clean. The womans place is not always in the kitchen and the men aren't the only ones doing the heavy lifting. Tonight I walked my fiance through a typical day in my life.

7 a.m.- This is what time I wake up every morning hoping that my 11 month old (Gabe) will go back to sleep and let me have at least another 30min. He never does, in fact, he doesn't even give my eyes time to adjust before he is in go mode. I change his diaper, all the while he is screaming and fighting me because he HATES having his diaper changed. I take him in the living room where I turn on his cartoons in hopes that he will actually let me put him down that morning so I can make him breakfast. I go into the kitchen, wash his tray, slice him up some fruit. While he eats I can unload the dishwasher and MAYBE load it before he finishes.

8:10- The little girl that I babysit gets dropped off. My 2 large dogs are barking viciously at the knock on the door, my 11 month is crying. I somehow manage to wrangle up my son and the 2 dogs to let Haiden and her mom in the door. I have to make small talk for 25 min. all the while trying to keep my dogs from licking Haidens mom in her face. Her mom leaves. I know it's time to feed the animals when my mountain lion sized cats start climbing up my legs screeching at me. I throw them some food, throw the dogs some food, and have to hold Gabe while they eat to keep him away from the dog bowls. I then dump out Haidens lemonade or juice and give her water. The two swap cups and I only give him water. The kids get a snack. And might entertain themselves for 20 min. while I finish wiping the counters and sweeping in the kitchen. At this point I am also allow to pour myself a much needed cup of coffee.

9:30- Time to change diapers and put them down for naps. Haiden first because her parents let her 'cry it out', this way I can try to get Gabe to sleep at the same time she does, so I can have an hour of peace and quiet. She goes in Gabes crib, Gabe goes on the couch. I can't get him to fall asleep because she is screaming. I've been instructed not to go in there though. So we wait. She's sleeping. I lie down on the couch with Gabe hoping that he will go down easily, never does. Unless he's in his crib he has to be rocked to sleep, this takes 30 min. It is now.....

10:30- I can't clean anything or make any noise at all while Gabe snoozes on the couch because he is such a light sleeper. Both my mom and Owen work from home, so I am constantly having to remind them to be quiet during this time. I sit on my computer, this might sound nice and peaceful but it's not. The whole time I'm thinking about all the things that need to get done and how I can't do them. This is also when I get to actually drink my now cold cup of coffee from earlier and get to eat breakfast, maybe. Usually Gabe will sleep for about an hour and a half.

12- Lunch time. Gabe pops up, ready to roll. I clean his tray and fix him lunch. A protein, a veggie, some cheese and some fruit. I have to change his diaper again. He screams and fights the whole time. I try to get some laundry done, but since Haiden is sleeping in Gabes crib in my room, I can't go in there to get it.

1- Haidens up. She screams to let us know. I now have to feed her lunch. Her parents pack her chef boy ardee raviolis every day. I try to give her healthy food but she always refuses to eat it. I don't know why I bother, because it's always a fight to get her to eat anything else and I always end up giving her the raviolis. The whole time I'm making her food she she screams in anticipation. The whole time.

1:30- This is when I take the kids on whatever outdoor adventure I choose for them. Either finger painting, to a petting zoo, on a long walk, to the park, etc. We just need to get out of the house. I change both diapers, put their shoes on. Make sure sippy cups are full, that we have snacks, wipes, diapers, cell phone, keys, wallet, etc. Oh, I guess I should brush my teeth before we leave and change out of my pj's into yoga pants and large tee.

2:00- We're out the door, in the car and on our way. Outside time lasts about an hour and a half because Haidens dad picks her up anywhere from 4:15-4:40.

3:45- We're home. Diaper changes, snack time in front of t.v. While I sit down for 5 min. I then make sure all of Haidens things are together and that she looks clean/presentable for when her dad comes. Unload the dishwasher. Gabes screaming because he's so tired. I can put him in his crib this time. He's now sleeping. I grab a load of laundry before I leave. I swoop through my house like a Tornado maid picking up everything in my path and depositing it where it belongs. Haiden is getting defiant.

4:15- She tests my patience for the next 20 min. While I watch the clock. It seems longer. I vacuum my floors, and do some laundry. I lock the dogs outside so they don't wake the baby up when Haidens dad knocks.

4:40-He's here. I make small talk again. Tell him about her day and they leave. I let the dogs in, scoop the litter box, do dishes and try to figure out what's for dinner. Gabes up.

5:00- Gabe and I run to the store to grab ingredients for dinner. He's a great shopping buddy.

5:40- We get home and I give him another snack while he entertains himself with his toys. The kitchen has become a complete disaster since I've left. I clean it....again.

6:00- I change Gabes diaper and get started on dinner. It's usually ready at about 7:30. Meanwhile I'm doing various chores and reading books to Gabe. Popping in and out of the social media world.

7:30- We eat.

7:45- Time to get Gabe in the tub and off to bed. This takes 45 min.

8:30- Gabe is in bed and sleeping by 9.

At this point I get to shower. Feed the animals again. I am so exhausted but I force myself to stay awake for another 3 hours so I can have some 'me' time.
All throughout the day the kids are screaming in the background, the dogs are barking, I'm tripping over toy cars and Gabe is bringing me the same book to read to him every 15 min. Which I always do.

I do all of this every day, with NO help.
Laundry: Mine, Owens, Gabes, my moms, all the towels, blankets, sheets, etc.
Cooking: I make sure everyone is fed, but I never get the chance to eat.
Cleaning: Obviously I'm the only one who ever does that.
Planning: I'm the one who makes sure everyone has what they need for an outing. Otherwise we would have nothing.

I realize that this is the life of a stay at home mom. I get that. But I just wish that every now and then I could turn the corner and see someone doing the dishes or a load of laundry or vacuuming. And I don't feel like I get enough credit for what I do.

Anyways, after explaining all of this to fiance, he cried. He has since taken out the trash, organized 5 cabinets in the kitchen, made me a bowl of cereal, picked up the living room and brought me a glass of water. We'll see how long this lasts.



NoWhiteFlag NoWhiteFlag
22-25, F
1 Response May 12, 2012

How are things now, are you getting any help in the house?