Post

My Husband, My Best Friend...

I met my husband when I was 19, he was 26. I met him through a guy I was sleeping with (ironic I know). The guy I was sleeping with wanted to "test" me, and see if I would cheat on him. He brought his friend down to meet me; his mistake! We ended up staying up the entire night talking, laughing, sharing, and getting to know one another. He ended up moving in with me shortly after. We were not intimate until years into the friendship, which created some confusion and chaos because I didn't want to lose my best friend (I think thats more of a woman thing, than a male issue). We remained best friends for 7 years, then we married :) We have been married for 13 years. We have grown up together, been through so many life experiences and life lessons together.
But, I do miss my best friend! The one I could share anything with; we are not as close as we were back then. Don't get me wrong, I love him with all my heart, but our years together have changed things. I think couples grow complacent, I think when you are with someone daily, you just naturally get too comfortable.
I've been working on myself, working on what I want out of my marriage, working on learning what makes my husband happy. Learning how people change as they grow older. Learning that you have to put the work into the marriage if you want to reap the rewards.
EP has taught me a lot, and I hope it continues to enlighten me.
I just wanted everyone to know that you can fall in love with your best friend and it can last a lifetime :)
Invisible2unow Invisible2unow 41-45, F 11 Responses May 16, 2011

Your Response

Cancel

Its a male thing too... I've known my best friend since the start of highschool and we are now both in uni. (Same uni different courses) I've had a crush on him since year 8 and the feeling was mutal during part of year 11. He refused every single time i asked him out because he didnt want to ruin our friendship. We are still really good friends and I still love him.

Sometimes married people do become complacent. Just remember the guy you fell in love with. Do little things to make his life easier, or better. Remember things you guys did when you first got together, and if you've stopped.. start doing them again. Put extra effort into your sex life again.

Its a hard thing, to find a really great guy that you can live with and love also. Some people let that go bc they miss that "new love" spark. And then end up letting the best thing in their life go.

I've fallen for a flatmate/good friend who I've known now for about 6 months. Really I've liked her our whole relationship. I'm not sure if I should tell her. She seems to be trying to set me up with girls at partys, and herself is being set up with men by her friends. Not sure if this is a sign I should keep her as a friend and not ruin anything by telling her my feelings. Sigh. This is not the first time I've fallen for a good friend.

I believe that "love" "trust" "honesty" are the basis for a relationship. Marriage is different as I'm sure you know. Marriage is building a life together, and you can only do that through mutual respect. If you dont have that, there is no "love" or "trust".

You are truly a very wise person, nurture the relationship and it will only get better!!!<br />
Good Luck..

best way<br />
<br />
i fell in love with my best friend at 12 years old<br />
we were married at 13 for love only not family way<br />
<br />
she lost her life at age 19 in viet nam the day after i was reported killed do to planbe crash the day beofre due to firnedly fire

My belief is a marriage must be ba<x>sed on:<br />
1) Friendship (best friends)<br />
2) Truth/Honesty<br />
3) Unconditional Love!

And is it really that way for you? R U living your beliefs? Don't take that wrong, just wondered if it's really possible. Thanks for the input :) My trust has been broken; I do not trust my husband.

My parents met when my dad was 19 and my mom was 17. They got married a year later, two months after my mom graduated from high school. My oldest sister was born 9 months and 1 hour after the wedding ceremony! (Well, almost). They're still married 37 years later. I doubt they'll ever spilt up, although we witnessed some colorful fights over the years. (I learned a few new words.) That's what I hope for, but so far no luck. All the guys I've met just want to boink me. I'd love to stay up all night and share stories and have the intimacy follow after we've become friends.

Mary, you will know when the right one comes along, and it will ALWAYS happen when you least expect it and aren't looking for love :) Then you will have your "Happily Ever After". But, guys wanting you can't be too bad LOL, means you are special! Take care

You realy missed having a good freind

Hmm? I don't understand?

I enjoyed your story. I also married my best friend's ex-girlfriend. I waited until after they broke up. We have been married now for fifty years and she is still my best friend. It would be an honor to be added to your circle.

Thanks RRFan. Congratulations on being married for 50 yrs, that's fantastic. Must have been a lot of give and take to make it that long!

Hey sexless, Thank u for commenting. I think we grew up, changed, and lost intimate contact with one another through those years. Often I feel like I'm living with a stranger. I think we should have used Rustoleum LOL!