My Best Friend And First Love..this is kind of long but.....
it started when I was 14 years old. I was a new freshman at school and he was a senior who knew my little brother from sports camp that summer, I honestly don't know how it happened but as soon as we met we clicked. We met sometime around the beginning of my freshman year and all year long he was my big brother, he had a girlfriend we never really talked about, but I knew her and knew how much he loved her. I never thought of him in the romantic sense back then, he was to brotherly for me, he was overprotective, goofy, a pain in my ***, played pranks on me and taught me many valuable life lessons.
He took care of me all through my freshman year and before I knew it he became my best friend. the next year came around and he went away to college, I thought I wouldn't hear fro him again but he surprised me by skyping me, calling me, and shooting me random texts all year. our bond grew closer, and before I knew it he was one of the most important relationships in my life. He would come over my house in the middle of the night when he visited home, he would take me out to lunch when he visited me in school, and he always made me feel better when I was upset.
My junior year things changed, we realized our relationship was changing and we began talking on the phone for longer periods of time, we would fall asleep skyping each other, and suddenly we hooked up for the first time. My world changed when it happened, he went from being my big brother, to best friend to someone I had a mix of emotions for. He taught me how to drive a car, he helped me pick out classes at school, he gave me advice, he even helped me look at colleges, his being one of them. a few weeks after it first happened I found out the most devastating news, he had been with my best girlfriend right before me and then dumped me to go back to her. It ruined my life, I lost two of my best friends from it and had my heart broken. for months I didn't speak to either of them and the next time I saw him, i yelled at him in the middle of my high school hallway, calling him out on all of his games. I don't think he had ever been caught that way. for the rest of the year he constantly tried to make it up to me, he didn't want to lose his best friend.
My senior year of high school I finally forgave him. he was a sophomore in college up to this point after taking a year off. He became my best friend again and our one rule was that we weren't allowed to talk about my best girlfriend, and they were not allowed to talk about me, I pretended it did not exist, it was the only way I could survive through it. My senior year went smoothly with him, we stayed best friends, talked every day, I even got accepted into my top choice college, his.
May of my senior year I got a text from him. it was a suicidal one. He had been struggling with depression for months and never reached out to anyone about it. I immediately went into action. I spent all my free time with him trying to cheer him up and help him, and for the most part it worked, he was never unhappy with me, and little by little he began getting stronger and healthier.
right before my graduation we had a "bestie" day so i call it, he came over my house and took me to dinner and movie. after he told me how he felt. He told me he made the biggest mistake by letting me go, he realized how much he felt about me after he felt like he had nothing, that I was the only thing at that time that made him happy and he never wanted to lose me. He told me he loved me more then just a best friend. that was the first night we had ever been together in that way.
now my freshman year of college we have put our hand at long distance, we have had a new experience growing through this stage in our relationship but i know that even through all the tears, heart break and ups and downs he is still at the end of the day the one thing that gets me through life. he is my best friend and my first love, and knowing that every night before he goes to sleep he thinks about me the same way I think about him is the most amazing feeling I could ever ask for.