He's so great:l

To put it simply i love him more than i could imagine and i guess some people would say its the hormones of my teenage years but i know that this is real because i can feel the pain in my heart when he talks about other girls or how my heart goes crazy when he looks at me and smiles. This is wrong i know thats what society would tell me but he's always been there for me... I've known him my whole life i used to sleep in his house when i was little and yeah as years went by we seperated like any normal cousin but about 3 years ago i started going to his house again, at first it was hard he never talked to me and when he did he always said something mean i thought what happened to my cousin. But as the years went by we got closer to eachother talking about girls, boys, friends, our whole lives came out to eachother. By the second year i was going there every weekend and i knew that this guy was the only one i would risk everything for if i got the chance. When they moved to a new house and got his own room i started sleeping next to him in the bed, it made my heart flutter hoping he was feeling the same way. A year passes and we had too many nights where we would sit up and talk or play games laughing our ***** off without caring who was right next door. And i stopped going for a month and for some reason when i came back it wasnt the same. He made up excuses to not sleep next to me, looked away everytime i looked at him, and said the same hurtful things like he did at the beginning... I thought it was getting better, i mean only a month ago he told me that this was my house now and that if i wanted to i didnt have to go back. I was crying a few days ago wondering if it was me or if he had finally tooken enough of me staring and being nice and sugar coating my voice sometimes.. He is the angel that saved me from hell, who was honest with everything, knew how to keep a secret... he was so important but now i see that i wasnt... I plan to just stop going after this new years, to throw away my feelings because he could never feel the same. I wonder if i'll tell him, i wonder if he already knows. He is the guy i'd risk everything for but the guy who wouldnt even give me a second thought.
skipbeat skipbeat
22-25, F
3 Responses Jul 21, 2010

THANKYOU SO MUCH! i will keep you informed i'm so happy others dont think i'm disgusting. I hope i can tell him one day. I will take your advice into consideration, my spirit went up while reading your comment.

Hello<br />
I do not know you exact age or his...But your thing says between 13-15 so i'm gonna assume hes around the same age too.....Which boys about 13 would pick on girls....boys are always immature when it comes to a crush...All I can say it just reach out to him as a friend like Grim1 mention and he might come around and when he seems mature enough and you feel the same share your feeling with him...You don't have to rush into anything at this moment cause you both are young but like I tell many young girls who are we to put a age limit on love...I do hope the best for you! and I hope one day you will be able to tell him your true feelings! if not you guys can at least have a good friendship!! Good Luck and please keep us inform. We are all here to support one another!! =)

Heh i do to...