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I Have Met Someone Online And He Broke My Heart

Before a year I was in relationship that didn't worked, I was suffering from depression and I felt completely lost. Then I met that guy online. I wasn't in the mood to meet anyone new, but he came to me and tried a lot to get my attention. He was so sweet and nice, sending me messages everyday, trying to earn my trust. After a while he told me that he hasn't met a girl like me before in his life, that I was the one and he was in love with me. At the beginning I stayed distant, I was in a relationship at that time and didn't wanted to start something new, but as the time passed we got more close to each other, we exchanged things from our past, and I have trusted him things that I have never told to anyone before. We were chatting everyday, talked on the phone. He was so caring and sweet, that in the end I have fallen in love with him. He told me that I was his dream girl, we were so happy and excited, so much in love. I was so happy, I had started feeling alive again and getting over my depression, I had something to believe in and dream of. I dreamed about the day that we would finally meet. We lived in different countries and I was trying to find a way for us to be together. He told me that he was coming out from a bad relationship, his ex has used him for sex and he suffered from depression and alcohol issues. He was broke and alone. I didn't mind, I was going to do anything to help him get over it. I have started gathering money to move in his country and I ended my relationship with the other guy because I wanted to be honest with everyone. I wanted to be only with him.
Suddenly he had changed. That was after a while I told him that I was in love with him too... He had started playing games, disappearing for days without a reason... It was like he wanted me to chase him... Then he appeared back after days pretending that everything was alright, I'm still the woman of his life, he couldn't wait for us to meet and be together. I couldn't understand his behavior, I tried to understand him, never pressured him, always being there when he needed to talk. He was still distant. When I finally asked him he said that he just didn't wanted to talk and that's all. I was hurt but didn't show it to him because I didn't wanted to make him feel stressed. I was still there waiting, being patient with him... he kept disappearing and then coming back telling that I'm the only thing he has in his life and he wants to be with me... it was like he was playing with my feelings. My heart was broken everyday by his behavior. that I finally took the decision to end that and leave. I thought that if he loved me he would try to keep me in his life, which he never did. After a while I found out that at the same time he was telling me he loved me, he was flirting online with at least 7 women. He was hiding everything from me :(
I send him one last message, asking him why he lied to me, but he didn't seemed to care at all, he tried to blame me telling me that I was adding stress into his life...
I never sent him another message, I kept my dignity and never showed him my pain. Now we haven't talked for 2 months and I feel more depressed than ever. I don't understand why he played that game... if he just wanted to flirt why he tried to earn my trust and talked to me about love?? Was I so naive to believe someone online? He seemed so real to me... He came to me at first place...
I feel like a fool, I feel played and betrayed... My depression got worst and I can't stop crying and thinking that it was all a lie... For a whole year I believed in a lie. Now I feel like I can't trust anyone or fall in love again. Why some men are so cruel and hurt others people's feelings? I am a real person, not just a pic online. I was real and never lied about anything, I didn't deserved to be treated that way. 
I just can't stand the thought that he caused me so much pain and now he might be fine with it, flirting, lying to someone else, having his fun...
I feel like I have lost my self confidence :(
Kristine26 Kristine26 26-30, F 7 Responses Nov 30, 2011

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The same just happened to me! The way you say you thought about him every night. Same! And now he's distant and i just knew it was all good to be true

Aww..my heart goes out to you and to all the women here whose hearts have been broken by online relationships. I can relate with all of you. I went through the same heartaches and heart breaks although not necessarily because of the same reasons that most of you went through. I understand how easy it is to fall in love online with a person whom you have not even seen or been with. The attention is just so flattering and it felt good to be loved, wanted and needed. This is not to say though that all men are not to be trusted. I have met true people on here. I guess we should just exercise extreme caution and take a lot of time in getting to know people before we give ourself away.

My story is the same yet different, so I'm going to tell it because I believe all you ladies will understand. I divorced the father of my child a few years ago and he was the love of my life. He cheated on me and completely destroyed me, it took me a long time to want to go out and date again, and now I regret the day I decided to take that step again.
A close friend called me up one day and said he had a single good looking friend that had a good job, was a very nice man and was also a single dad that was looking to date someone. My friend asked if I wanted to meet him and I said well I guess but not in a blind date I will go to your house and meet him there and if we get along then we will take it from there. So the encounter was set up for a Friday but then my friend called me and said that his wife didn't want any more people hanging out at their home so maybe we could meet on Saturday and I said ok. Again my friend calls and says we cant hang out on Saturday either but my friend wants your number can I give it to him, and I said yes.
Here is were the fun begins for this sick man. He began texting me at about 7:40 pm Friday chatting up lines, picking me up. He was good, like a poet enchanting his reader. Maybe it was the fact that I hadn't dated since forever, but I fell, I fell Friday night. We couldn't see each other that night because we both had our children but we set it up for the following night. I sent him my picture and he sent me his. We continued texting till I fell asleep at around 1 am. Over 200 text messages were sent the first night.
Saturday came we continued texting....but in the afternoon he said he was called in to work so we couldn't see each other that night either, we continued texting while he was working all through the night. Then came Sunday, he answered one text saying he was still sleeping and would call me when he would wake up....He didn't call. We were supposed to go out that night. He finally appeared at 7 he said he would take a shower eat something and pick me up.... he never did.... he never picked up his phone that night either. He reaper ed two days later saying he had left his phone in brothers car and that he wanted nothing to do with me that I didn't let him breath.
I spent the next three days crying and he called again saying he was sorry. The texting started again, but again he was like I can't meet you tonight, so finally I got sick of it and told this has all been a game to you hasn't it. And he finally admitted it and said that even the picture he sent me wasn't of himself, it was of someone else. Why would someone be so sick to do all this to me I have no idea. All I know is that it hurts, he messed with my head and my heart and all for what?? I mean was this fun for him.

This also happened to me. And I genuinely thought it would work out, because we spent months cautiously getting to know each other online, finding out what we had in common and falling in love with each others personalities, rather than going just on looks. It was the strongest I'd ever felt about anyone, and he said exactly the same about me. He was incredibly kind, thoughtful and supportive, told me every day he loved me, and I felt happier than I ever had before. When we finally met, I could tell within 24 hrs that he wasn't interested and it was probably the most painful rejection I've ever had. All our plans for the future binned. I genuinely think all men care about is looks - even if they say they love a womans personality or character that is only because they have already fallen in love with her appearance and think they love the rest of her. They don't. I would tell you not to worry, plenty more fish in the sea etc, but I really don't think a single one of them are worth it. Try to live a happy life for yourself and never rely on a man for self esteem if you can possibly help it.

I met him online, I lived with him for a year, under the same roof. He was obsessed with me from the start. Things fell apart, of course. With the same rush his feelings came, they went too, in the wind. Never trust a man who is too madly in love with you from the very start. And this was a supposedly mature man, in his late 40s at the time. Now, he doesn't even know I exist, that I ever did!

It's scary how similar my story is to yours... I met a guy online as well, in an online game (nerdy I know!) We have spent SO much time talking to each other, I think I kind of fell in love with him... but the whole time he was talking to this other girl. I asked him about her many times and he assured me she was just a friend. I even talked to her a few times ... well some things happened where I thought I might leave the game for a bit and the second I told him that he went to me he liked her despite saying he never had feelings for her ... It seriously hurts. Because at first, I was so distant like you but as I grew closer to him... I think he grew bored and impatient with trying to get more out of me since I am such an introvert sometimes... He's told me that she's the exact opposite of me and he still wants to be friends... but it really hurts ! I don't want them to be together. Just thinking about it my stomach hurts and my throat tightens.. I am just telling you my story so you know you're not alone... I've felt such highs and now I feel so depressed again.. I've been crying a lot lately. So sad.. I thought about moving to where he lives too... I've just been telling myself I deserve better. We don't deserve to be treated this way, you and I. We will find someone else. Sure.. it hurts now.. but.. just hold on like I am trying to. Let's just move on, let out all of our frustrations .. despite how hard it seems at this very instant.. day by day we can do this !

Thank you so much my friend, I have cried a lot too, I was crying almost everyday the last months... I'm feeling better now but we have mutual friends, so I see his pic everyday. It's really difficult, my feelings about him are all negative now, I don't want to be with him anymore, I have lost all my trust, but like you said I can't stand the thought that he might be with another woman. He wants us to be friends too, but I don't want to, to be friends with him and watching him flirting with other women?? No way! We deserve better than that my sis, I wish I knew you, we would have so much things to discuss about that experiences :/ Just hold on, at first I thought that my heart would break in two and I would day, I haven't felt so much pain before in my life, but now i'm feeling much better, at least I don't cry every day like I used to....

Gosh, I can understand. Iv'e been in such a situation.

As hard as it may sound, you have to move on, No option.

Good luck.

Thank you :)