Friendship Turns Into Unrequited Love.

We met here on EP and became very good friends in a short span of time. I felt the mind connect immediately.  My instincts about him were accurate.  We should have met in real life.  It is such agony that we haven't met, yet.

What should I say about him?  He is, first and foremost, a wonderful human being.  Kindness is his second name.  He is a darling of anyone who knows him.

To be honest, he has better friends than me in his real life.  After all I am just a figment of the cyber world.  I could disappear at any point in time.  So could he.

Nevertheless, the love I feel for him is so real.  I imagine us together.  I dream we are having so many kids.  The thought of being pregnant and pampered by him. His hand on my bulging tummy.  It hurts.  It is so real.  I want to have dozen kids with him.  Me!  I never ever liked the thought of being pregnant.  In fact I argued with my ex-husband about it.  I asked him to adopt one from an orphanage.  

I became angry with my friend for not returning my love.  Said some nasty things.  I thought I had hurt him and he will surely end the friendship.  I didn't want that.  Let me have him as a friend if not as a lover.  He continues to be a wonderful friend.  But that's it.  Does he love someone else? No, he doesn't.  This makes me hopeful.

I am an eternal optimist.