How To Make A Male Milking Machine "venus 2000"First, search for a "Surge Milker" from ebay; you can get one for about $50.
In addition to the Surge Milker, you need to purchase a Gast vacuum pump from ebay; make SURE it runs on 110 volts and not 220,. and is rated at least 3 amps or 350 watts.
Take the pulsator (the little thing on top of the cannister) and the top of the cannister to the hardware store, or Home Depot etc; go to the section where they keep the plastic nylon-mesh hoses; find and purchase about 10 feet of plastic hose for each size of the three different-sized nozzles (2 on the pulsator, one on the cannister-lid).
There will be three sizes--
10 feet 5/8" O.D for for the big nozzle on the pulsator,
3/4" OD for the middle-sized one for the four nozzles on the top of the cannister, and
1/2" O.D. for the four smaller nozzles on the pulsator.
(It's not ESSENTIAL to take the pulsator and cannister-lid, but you might want to make sure they fit before you buy them).
You'll need two of these hoses for the pulsator (the little thing on top of the milker): the 5/8" hose and the 1/2" hose.
Now, run the biggest (5/8") hose from the Gast pump, to the one BIG pulsator nozzle. Run the 1/2" hose from one of the smaller nozzles on the pulsator, to the small nozzle on one of the shells (later).
Run the 3/4" to the medium-sized nozzle on the milking-cannister lid.
Secure all the un-used nozzles with Duct tape or some type of rubber cap (also available at the hardware store).
As for the sleeve (the thing you stick your **** in :-),
just use one of the cups that come with the surge milker, but remove the ENTIRE rubber portion, using strong scissors. You ONLY want the stainless steel portion.
Here's how to modify the metal shell (cup) to fit your ****:
First, purchase a 2" wide (or wider) bicycle innertube from any store that sells them; make SURE it's NOT a "self-sealing" style tube.
Using scissors, cut about a 12" length of the bicycle innertube. Twisting it, force one end of the section into the hole in the smaller end of the metal shell, then work it through until it gets out of the big end. Now pull it out about 2 inches, and then stretch this over the big end. Now secure this with duct tape by wrapping it around the shell.
Next, pull the other portion tight through the small end, then force the middle-sized hose snug against the hole with the innertube around it; it won't fit through, but this is good because it will hurt if it does!
Secure this with duct tape as well; it must be air-tight against the shell, and not free to move with any exposed rubber around the hole.
Now, attach the other end to one of the four nozzles on the cannister.
Finally, run the smallest hose from the smaller nozzle on the shell, to one of the four small nozzles on the pulsator.
Make sure you use duct tape to close off the three remaining nozzles on each the cannister and pulsator; there must be NO open nozzles or air-leaks or it won't work.
Now, switch on the Gast Pump. The pulsator should begin pumping about once every second; if not, adjust the screw valve to make it faster or slower. The rubber liner (inner-tube) in the shell should begin pulsating, surging and sucking along with it.
Lube up the big end of the shell with a WATER-SOLUBLE lubricant like K-Y or J-lube; do NOT use an oil-ba
The nozzle should suck your **** into it, but make sure that there are no air- leaks; once youg get it going, you can adjust the force of the vacuum by the screw-valve on the pump, while you can adjust the rate of pulsation with the screw-valve on the pulsator.
This should get you off in no time; a good trick is to completely close the pulsator-valve when you're about to ***, so that it gives a constant vacuum; this can literally suck the *** out of you for what seems like forever.
I've had a lot of emails asking more about the milking machines and how to get one. I don't build them yet but you can make one and I can supply the receiver tube for you.
The following is instructions on how to build a milker. Most of the instructions were originally posted in the Milking Men by Machines group in mid 2003 by Indredibletulkas. I've updated the prices and added some of my ideas:
First, search for a "Surge Milker" from eBay. You can get one for about $75, including shipping. Make sure it works before you pay for it. If the seller doesn't guarantee that it works you are going to have to have the pulsator rebuilt if you get it and nothing happens when you hook it up. That can delay your fun for a couple of weeks. There are rebuild kits available but it is easier to get one that works.
You are also going to need to a Gast or similar vacuum pump from eBay. If you are in the USA make sure it runs on 110 volts and not 220. It also needs to be rated at least 3 amps or 350 watts, 4 amps is better. Figure about $125 - $150, including shipping.
You will need 3 different size hoses. I use the clear / nylon mesh type. Home Depot sells the hoses in 10' lengths. Lowe's and Ace sells them off of a roll.
A 3/4" outside diameter hose to go from the Gast Pump to the pulsator. I use 20' because the pump is noisy and the further away you can put the pump, the quieter the milk session. I put my pump in the hall bathroom then close the door to keep the noise down.
You will also need equal lengths of 1/2" outside diameter hose to go from the pulsator to the small connector on the tube and 5/8" outside diameter hose to go from the larger connector on the tube to the opening on the pulsator that goes to the milk bucket. Buy some tie wraps to bind the 1/2" hose and the 5/8" hose together
While at the hardware store you will also need some tape to seal off the 3 unused pulsator ports and the three milk bucket ports you won't be using. I use electrical tape.
You will also need a ceiling hook like is used to hang a plant or a chain lamp. The hook will be used to suspend the hose and tube above your ****. I hook a short "screen door" spring to the ceiling hook. On the other end of the spring I attach a bungee cord. To the other end of the bungee hook I attach the hose. The hardware stores sell springs and bungee cords.
Connect the 3/4" hose to the Gast pump and run it to the biggest port on the pulsator. Now, attach the 5/8" hose to the next largest port and the small hose to the smallest port. Make sure the other ports are sealed and have no air leaks. Connect the other ends of the hoses to the tube. Figure on spending less than $30 for everything you will need at the hardware store.
You can't use the teat cups that may come with the Surge Milker unless you have a tiny ****. You will have to build a receiver tube or buy one. I will sell you a custom made "Milk Maid" receiver tube, any length and either 1.5" or 2" diameter for $45, including shipping.
Now, switch on the Gast Pump. The pulsator should begin pumping about once every second; if not, adjust the screw valve to make it faster or slower. The receiver tube should begin pulsating, surging and sucking along with it.
If everything is working, adjust the tube so it is suspended above your **** and lube up. Lube up the big end of the tubes with Vaseline or whatever lube you like, along with your ****. Albolene is the best feeling but will break down the liner after a few uses. I will not warranty the liner if there is evidence that a petroleum ba
The tube should suck your **** into it. The pulsator will make the tube go up and down on your ****. The screw valve adjusts the speed. This should get you off in no time. A good trick is to completely close the pulsator valve when you're about to ***, so that it gives a constant vacuum; this can literally suck the *** out of you for what seems like forever.
I bought a few from Mike who used to build them for Slingbay. The construction is quite simple PVC pipe, PCVcap, tire inner-tube and two brass pipe fittings. Contact me directly and I can give you a rough idea on the construction......if you are somewhat handy....it shouldn't be too difficult for you.