I Feel Sad And Lonely

I'm 20 years old. I feel like I should be having the best time of my life right now, but I'm not. I feel so lonely and worthless. Nobody wants to hang out with me. I always call people and everyone is "busy". I don't even know why this is happening to me Why me? Weekends are horrible for me. While everyone goes out to the movies, dancing, eating at restaurants, I just stay home and feel sad. I'm tired of people rejecting me. I know people don't hate me but I guess I was meant to be alone :(
I feel dead even though I'm alive
sadgirl20 sadgirl20
22-25, F
92 Responses Jun 2, 2010

I feel exactly like u. I'm so so depresses I don't know what to do anymore. I try to be social but it's hard for me to be around people. I am always feeling rejected and unwanted and unappreciated. I feel lonely even when I am around other people. I just want to feel happy for once in my life. I'm tires of laying awake at night crying.

I feel the same. Though I'm sure our feelings aren't the same. Not saying any feeling is the same, just different circumstances. Just was told my mom has late stage lung cancer. The alone feeling is numbing. Everyone wants to hang with me. Everyone is all of a suddent wanting to help... I still feel alone. The only thing that helps me is being Alone and finding ways to love myself. I know that's no help really. But I encourage it. Find yourself through hard times and It will get better.

Add a response...

i totally understand your situation.. i am one of your kind. although i do have boyfriend, but never got anything that i deserve.

I know this was written many years ago I am just now reading your entry I am 32 years old and have been feeling the exact same way you are and never had the courage to reach out and say it I have felt this way through my 20 s and now in my 30 s

i can understand your situation.i do have the same problem.when i was at school i actualy have no friends.i had suffered the same problem of rejecting.everyone in the class will enjoy ,and i will sit at a corner and carry on reading books. in that situation i felt very sad .but as i grow up this situation is automaticly leaving from my life . and now everything is going to be fine ...dont worry the day is not very far when people stop rejecting u:) if u want help or someone to listen ...im always here for u .. u just need to msg me...:)

Wow so sad I feel the same way

I lie in the same criteria. You are 20 I am 19.<br />
But I love my seclusion its very enjoyable dear you should also enjoy it :).

I feel the same way. I have problems with connecting to other people. I don't think they really dont like me, but I guess it's difficult for them to talk to me when I'm shy and sending depressive signals. I want to be happy and have the energy to hang out with people, but I don't.

Hi I completely no how U feel in going through the exact same thing I have become realy low and depressed :( and know one wants to hang around with me

i too feel the same way. i have 3 wonderful kids ages 9 mths, 3 and 6. i am with their daddy. we are high schoo sweethearts. even though i am not single i feel like a loner. all he literaly does is work n hang out with his friends. when he is home all he does is eat n sleep. i will be lucky to have time with him if tat at all maybe 2 hrs of his awake time every other day. he never takes me out. he never helps me with the kids. im constantly exhausted. i have no friends. all the women in my family sucks cuz for watever reasons them girls are always jealous of me cuz im a very hard working mother. i think everyone esp a stay at home mother needs time away away from the house but i dont have tat. i woukdnt anything for my kids. i love being a mom but so wish i had some adult social life too. life is so beautiful and so unfair. :(

i have 2 children and i'm in the same boat with you their father is always out of the house with friends or working or going to the gym or w/e he can do to make sure he's never here. and even when he is here he doesn't help me out with anything. i even told him i felt like i live in nanny servant. maybe if you live near me we can kinda fix it a little and have our kids play together just to have a break from doing the 24/7 mom gig

I so wish that too. Everyone needs somebody and people look at me like im a saint cause i have it all. No. No one understands just cause theres a perfect picture family going on, theres more to a happy relationship than just a roof over your head. I must be crazy to even think to have another child in the future. I have been a stay at home mom since my first born was two. Its now five years later. LOL. whats your email.? we can email eachother and talk bout our lives and share stories.

Go back and read ( streets 718 ) again.

Hey if u need someone to talk to just friend me

i doubt i can really be much help, but i'm sitting here in the middle of the night reading all these stories and comments by people, and i've been chatting back and forth and have come to realize that a lot of times people just need someone to talk to; to listen to them. i like to think that i am a true loving heart in this insane universe. these things that seem so important right now, your friends and what they think......you'll come to see that you are giving that way too much power. if you look deep inside yourself, at what you truly are, i think you will come to see that your own perception is the most accurate truth. most other people will tell you to just listen to them, but i say to you "listen to your own heart, for therein lies the truth". everyone goes through the same doubts and fears that you are now experiencing. it sounds stupid, but i can tell you from hard, bitter experience that listening to those who should know better will only lead you down the same foolish road that they took. you are smarter than that, you are bigger than that, and if you open yourself to divine guidance from within, you don't need anyone else to figure things out for you;you will come to see a deeper truth than they may ever know. believe in yourself. whether you know it or not, this is creation and every decision you make determines what happens in the universe. this is not religion, it's physics. do the best you can, sister, the entire universe is depending on it.

no one is meant to be alone. My friends are the same way, and I feel like I am the only one who really cares about being there for people. All I can tell you is that you are a beautiful person and that there is no purpose in life but what you make for yourself. I am here for you if you want to talk :)

You are 2 years older than me, and you describe so much that I feel, thank you for sharing. This is the first thing I have read on this site and I am feeling like I could be understood.. You made my night. Thank you so much...

i have the same age as you, and im leaving almost the same thing :x i don't have a lot people to hang out, buy it hurt anyways .. im pratically the second choice everysingle time.. and when i go out, i feel like im just being there, nothing else!
every night i think about that and i end up crying xx

go out meet new people! enjoy life!

those same people who r to busy for u r the same people that dont matter if u dont matter to them then they shouldnt matter to u. when u call these friends do u talk about depressing stuff alot? maybe u shouldnt do that if u do. and being someone that has a lot of friends the one thing i find the most annoying is when my friends call me constantly and talk about nothing but sad things. now i would never tell my friends i dont care actually i do care. i let them rant and all but u got to remember that in life u r born alone and u will die alone and if u dont have fun hanging out with urself how can anyone else enjoy u. i hope for u to find peace and happiness with in urself and i assure u u will be so happy that ur friends will notice and u wont have to worry about spending all ur days alone... also u might want to try finding new friends... ones who do understand and love u

I also feel the same. When I see back I see myself standing lonely. I cry daily. I don't know what to do and what not to do.

Me too, It's tiring and absolutely draining. I know the daily crying as well.

I know what you mean.. 20 years old and i already feel dead.. just waiting to get pregnant.. it be nice to have people who won't try to use you.. or a family who doesn't think you owe them everything.. cause their so ******* selfish..

u r not meant to be alone, cheer up, someone in this world is waiting for u,

I feel disconnected from people too. When I meet new people I have a hard time interacting with them because I don't know them and feel they may think of me as a burden to be around because I am socially awkward. It's even worse when I go on Facebook because I see how happy everyone else is. I'm only 16, so maybe its just teen angst I don't know for sure.

I feel the same about Facebook. It reminds me of how awful my life is. Just leave it, and don't sign in, you will be very glad of this decision. I stopped using it for 2 days, and I'm much happier. If I sign-in again, I will become angry and depressed again.

I have friends and usually I'm not alone, but I don't feel like I have a deep emotional connection with them. That really frustrates me because sometimes in my head I just feel like I'm going crazy, but I feel like I have to just smile and pretend to be ok. I'm not sure if I'm really depressed or just sad. I think I have social anxiety or something, because when I'm in a big group and someone suggests that we go do something, I immediately think that I'm probably not invited because no one really likes me. Which logically I know is not true, but those feelings persist in a lot of areas in my life. Especially on the romance front, I'm 21 but I've never had a boyfriend because when I go to bars, parties, or when I'm just hanging out with boys in general, I feel like no one would like me if I talked to them. So I don't talk. And when someone talks to me I just get so hung up on not seeming weird. it sucks to feel alone

I am also 20 and I am in the same situation as you. Some changes in my life (move outs etc) brought me in this situation. I had friends which left to study many KMs away, so I basically left myself. I study something this period, but I couldn't manage to find friends there. If I am lucky, I may chat with some classmates, but that's it, after I leave the class I am alone. I feel sad sometimes about my situation, and sometimes not. Maybe it is that I'd rather be alone, than having fake and stupid friends (which I had in the past). I found some enjoyable activites to do, in order to stop feeling like a dead walker and this is what works for me and gives me hope for the future. If you want to talk with me and share thoughts, you could send me a PM.

look, probably people with your age is way less mature than you and that´s why they are always busy doing things with people who shares their shallowness. My advice to you is: try to meet older people who appreciates your identity.loneliness is solved finding kindred spirits.i lived in london for 3 years with my ex girlfriend.she left me although she kept living in the same house as me.i never felt more lonely.there is so many people lonely just because they are not looking in the right place.join a gym, you will meet dozens of people while you get fit.that will attract the opposite sex as well.believe me, gyms are the best place to meet people.try it and you will see i am right

I really feel bad this evening that made me decide to search over the internet assuming that there will be answers to my questions. oftentimes, i ask myself whats wrong with me that most of my friends talk behind my back knowing that im not doing anything bad against them. i always try to be nice but why do i always feel alone and sad at the end of the daY? reading your posts made me realize that i have so much more way to go. i dont have to hate and blame myself just because people can't accept me. i know i have to love myself and trust God instead. we are on the same boat. i find this sharing perse very helpful. i may not have friends in person, but i know that someone like you is willing to listen.. thanks.

Yeah im lonley too...my b.f is my only and best friend its hard cuz i had to cutt friendz off tht i thought were friends but werent they jus hung with me if they needed sumthing but enjoy life go for walks meet ppl online thiers alot of great guys jus gotta find tht rite one but if u wanna true friend im here ;)

& being alone is a GREAT thing! ..u dont have to share ANYTHING wth ANYONE! ..lol

Good Lord. Is that the best you can come up with? Most of these people are crying out for advice. Not silliness.

How is expressing how I feel.... SILLY?... MOUSY

Obviously you must get the last word in this ongoing year long battle of comments! Here, let me help you. Expressing how you feel isnt wrong.... Now, coming onto a forum specifically for people who don't feel great about how their lives are going and want to talk about it or vent... and then TELLING them how to feel, IS wrong. Its like making fun of someone for having an injury and telling them to cheer up, and that it could be worse. You are not helping, sure it could be worse, but that person is dealing with some pain. I cannot believe you think it is acceptable to come trolling here. So I will say it again. Get. Out.

:) Ahhh...nice and refreshing. Thanks TheRQCKSTARZHquSeNHDZQ3, I feel MUCH better after having yelled at a jerk like you.

Well, look at th BRIGHT side, at least ur not HANDICAP or disabled, ..& NO! ..loneliness is NOT th same thing!

What if you are handicapped and have cyclothymia? Get. Out.

I really hope that I can say something useful here:<br />
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I used to feel sad and lonely a lot, I spent a lot (a lot) of nights crying myself to sleep from a pretty young age mostly due to family troubles which lead to troubles with my friends. <br />
<br />
One thing that really helped me was changing my outlook to be more positive towards life. For me I read a couple of books (the names of which escape me, sorry!) and I watched the DVD of 'The Secret' (many believe it's rubbish but honestly all you need to learn from that DVD is to take charge of your thoughts and make them positive!).<br />
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So basically once I started being a more positive person it just attracted people to being around me. I got really good at it and it was great! More positive thoughts = more positive actions = even more positive thoughts and so on.<br />
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Obviously this is only part of the solution as you will need to go out and actually meet people, but with social media being the way it is these days you will just have to put yourself out there and strike up convorsations (Australia spelling), just don't get too comfortable - you have to push your comfort zone and go out with people in person. Invite someone out to the movies or something.<br />
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Anyway I read through all of these responses and you all sound like beautiful loving people, I wish there was more that I could do to help...

Sad Girl, I actually envy you because you are so young. You have to realize your worth is not what other people make of you- or, what you perceive as others' opinions. Slow down...you have your whole life in front of you! I'm sad and lonely, too, but I'm 54 years old, and don't have the choices you have in life. If people reject you- find someone who appreciates and values you for who you are. You may not think they are out there but I guarantee you that you'll find that person. Then you'll be happier.

*hugs tight*

:) Hello andro333, thank you very much for taking interest in my undoubtedly long tangent. I am happy that you found it to be of benefit for you. It is always my pleasure to be of assistance, providing that it is feasible. Have a good day.

:) Hello, sadgirl20. Foremost, I would like to begin by saying that I have perused all of the comments thus far, and those sentiments one way or another encapsulate the state of my current life. On respectful behalf of all, I deeply regret to hear of your pain that you feel alienated and / or dissociated from society. I am one caliber above sadgirl20, a 21-years-old guy, and my life is empty of zest, absent of friends, a place of employment, relationships and the wonderment of adventure. :( <br />
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Though, I am ambitious, possessing talents in the facets of writing / songwriting / lyricism / poetry, which I have developed an affinity for, residing under my parents' roof, I am currently treading / traversing the path in outright, lonesome disregard by my peers, though I have a wonderful, loving family who I love dearly and have supplied me with the best foundation that any son could have ever asked for, I continue to uphold the title of "emblematic of the unknown" (lyrics from Thrice's "Image Of The Invisible" and have been the source for cold seclusion. <br />
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I am sorry, ladies and gentlemen, but I cannot ignore my inclination to make the conclusion, that I simply cannot see any of my peers engaging in any conservation with me or welcoming my friendship. Moreover, as being single and virginity has been painful since the dawn of middle school, for all of the beautiful lipgloss smiles and jewels that have captured my curious eyes and immobilized my step, their selective kiss will never paint my vacant lips. Of course 'never' should be a word that is seldom used. <br />
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Not me, for I am not "Hollywood bod" quality. I just cannot envision any girl ever wanting me or falling in love with me. It is just not feasible. :,( It would appear to me that some people truly are not meant to be the recipient of Cupid's love arrow or lose their virginity. When I juxtapose myself with others, sometimes I feel like an alienated freak. I really do, and it hurts. :( <br />
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I believe that what deters others from meeting my acquaintance is my insecurities, my sophisticated jargon and of course my looks. A girl had once inconspicuously and rudely said, while I was diligently working in my college library, "Nice face; eww". It was truly as if my heart and confidence temporarily melted. Discrete tears trickled, but I was sure to render them scarce. <br />
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It is such a shame because I think that I am such a sweet, loving and caring son / brother, and I could soothe the heart of any sweetheart. On numerous occasions, my father has payed me one of the nicest compliments that anybody could receive. He has said that I am a caretaker, and brought the biggest smile to my face like you do not know. :) It could not be a more true sentiment; I have the capacity to love and to serve as a mentor to those who seek a remedy. :) <br />
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I strive to be a more sweeter, lovable, empathetic, sympathetic, and caring person; I want to be the keeper of the key to an angel's heart. But alas, the people cannot identify the fruit of my heart; they can only issue prejudgments at the discretion of the ego. <br />
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Therefore, it is for this reason that I have resorted to the realms of songwriting and music producing, for I can comfortably convey all of my emotions, my desires for love / romance on a vacant canvas that welcomes my irregular rhymes and always appreciates them. :) Music is a vitality, which helps to provide a release and softens my sadness and bids a smile to dominate. :) <br />
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Irregardless of the fact that I am ultimately alone when gas out in the four-wheel drive, my pride is not swallowed because I love who I am. I am happy to have discovered 'Experience Project' because I am met with the acknowledgement that, on the contrary, I am not alone. :) I hope that, despite your feelings, you still love yourself, you have been able to make friends and that you find the love of your life. I will surely be praying for you. :)

I wish I knew how to help. But you see, I only found this becausr I seek a solution to the same issue. I am 18 and I have kind friends for the first time but they have all known each other so long. Me? I've been alone my whole life, but I still can't get used to it. It hurts so ******* much. I feel your pain.

I was reading through the comments trying to find someone who solved this, I am really lonely, even though I try to go out every night in this period, I don't enjoy it all the time and the "friends" I have are very shallow.. sorry for adding another depressing comment to the long list..


I am 25 and often feel very lonely. I have friends but we don't really share our feelings and concerns. We just hang out and "have a good time."<br />
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I felt that I was becoming close friends with a girl, but today I saw her in a large group setting and realized that she is simply super-friendly with everyone. Don't you hate it when you think that you are developing a close relationship but to the other person it doesn't mean as much? That hurts.<br />
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I want friends to discuss my day with and whom I can help with their problems, but my friends are just interested in partying.

Hmmm... That’s terrible. Not so different with me. Most people are shallow I guess. The important is to keep looking others like you. The world is big and there must be others that are similar to you.

Im in the same situation. Im a 22 girl and I have no friends. I moved half way across the country 2 years ago only to find im still lonely and depressed. I just want to have fun and live...but no one wants to chill.

Its same for me, I dnt kno what to even do with myself no more...at this point any type of conversation with anyone is rare I have no one

Everyone feels rejected or extra sometimes, but try getting busy by going out,working,gym,etc let others notice you and i am sure you do have good qualities like everyone does

Well I'm just like you guys I'm smart pretty and a truely nice person...I dnt have no friendz no job no nothing . Itz suckz but I keep telling myself it'll be ok. I feel worthless somtimes cus a lot of people I went to school with or my own family is movin on living life to the fullest. I try to talk to some of my family and try to have fun with them seems lile they dnt really want to but....at least I tried:) ima keep going to school for my ged and just enjoy that until I find a job or somthn lol I just hope that I get that happiness in my life before it all endsz.

Hi sadgirl20, this is my first post. But I thought I'd respond to what others are posting first.<br />
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I was reading your post last night (couldn't sleep) but only now I feel like I understand what you're saying. Some people are rather selfish in the sense that they interact with people with whom they think will get something out of, like "this person makes me happy", "this person makes me laugh", "this person has good advice". They're not really interesting in other people, they're more interested in themselves. It's like they prefer eating ice cream and chocolate even though they have few health benefits, but it makes them feel happy. I think with these kinds of people, just accept who they are and the fact that they are and that they are really preoccupied with themselves.

I'm in the same boat. As a result, I am skeptical about friendships.

Life really feels like it sucks so bad sometimes, and will never get better. you go through your day doing the same old thing. reaching out, and being rejected. and it really sucks. I hate it. when i was your age, i was the same way. Right now, i am the same way. but somewhere in between were many years of happiness. <br />
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and i know in the future there will be more happiness. <br />
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I take comfort in knowing that there are many many more people just like me, who are outcasted, alienated for no good reason. I strugle by myself, but i am not alone. and this will not last forever. although it feels like it will, before you know it you will be in love and all twitterpated. My advice, Do not give up! <br />
<br />
i have faith in you

you really want to know how to get rid of being sad & lonely .you have to be happy with your self first try new things do your hobbies exercise, laugh, make jokes, forgive others and your self .enjoy this life ,one day we will be gone we don't have to spend this short time being sorry for ourselves or waiting for sympathy or miracles live it as it is and change things you don't like with your magical touch

I think we all feel that way no matter our age, accomplishments, etc. I know that in my particular case is because the home I grew up in. My parents were and I think still are what they call "toxic parents" in other words, parents that never encouraged you to take risks, never taught you how to have self confidence and neverrrrr to become independent; on the contrary, they'll find ways for you to relay on them as much as possible so they can be in control of your life forever. When you grow up in home like that is hell, you learn really fast how to hate yourself. They would destroy your self esteem and your self image. That's why I never feel adequate or accepted anywhere and it's so difficult for me to trust people, have friends and get along with coworkers. Ever since I was very little, I was called so many horrible names, sooooooo many times that I ended up believing in them. I'm 44 yrs old and to this day, I have a horrible marriage of myself and I don't have any kids because I didn't want them to suffer and feel misserable just like I do. There is not a day in my life that I love myself or think good things about me. All I have in my mind are the voices of my parents and sibilings telling me how stupid, ugly, disgusting, gross, etc., I am. This is all very sad because I'm sure I'm not the only one with this problem which I think is the root cause of many emotional problems in our society. I need to get help ASAP because lately I've been feeling like the only way out of my missery is doing something very stupid. God help me!!

i think you are big enough to stop believing or thinking of what they were saying to u .and as a start you know that they were wrong with the way they tried to teach u .all i want to say is that u have to stop listening or thinking of what they did to u ,move on don't loose your past and future as well you really have a big chance to gain your life and may be to do better things and also to make your wife happy with bringing little angels into your life .....best luck

talk of loliness,growing up i was such a vibrant child.i dd absolutely everthing at school and talk of smartness i was always on top of my game.ive always been talkative and probably still own one of the biggest mouths that God ever created.things changed at some point in life when i started to understand that i was actually staying wth ma grandparents nt my real parents as i thought before.i became an angry child ,i hated everyone around me ,i felt neglected yet i isolated my own self.can you real judge me ,ofcourse not ,i felt like my parent never cared.i struggled to get a birth certificate and those are the tears i will never forget...a fight for identity only cause my parents were not there.things got worse wen my only best friend stabbed me at the back by dating my boyfrand of 5 years.she knew i luved the guy yet she mercilessly crushed the only piece of heart i had left in me.things became worse i swore never to luv again and i swore never to have a friend .i became a loner,i suffered from deppression and i found myself fighting to be different from my parents and in due course i made the worst decisions that a human being cannever make.the anger in me grew and i blamed it on my past yet i had the chance to change.you might wondering why im telling you all this but my real message is ...find the source of ur loliness and then solved it.there is only one way to fill the emptiness in ur heart God is an amazing God ,seek his kingdom and the rest will follow.one night wen i was crying over my depression ,he told me his words "seek my kingdom and the rest will follow"from that day ive never looked back.i walk with him everry day of my life ....im the happeiest person ever...yes im still the most talkative but now i sae words of wisdom.try God .....

I can echo this - I'm 25 and I know I'm supposed to be enjoying myself with friends, but I do feel really lonely and not really fitting in.

I feel that way too since High school...peer seeking is difficult for me....now that i read what you had written,I feel Im not alone...Were not alone.remember that :-)

I feel the same, friends?

hi sadgirl20 i have had depression all my life and i have had the same type of life as you said in your story . sadder still as your friends depart , get married it will get worse. Its something that is a part of all of us, and it hurts much more to ones whom care in their hearts for others, as the honesty shows clearly.

hey don't worry dear everything will be fine u'll be all fine and life goes on u'll definately find somebody else and u guys will share a much better bond !!!!there is love and beauty all around u !!!!

Yeah I know how that is like. I feel that now. I have no car and I live with my parents. I work 40 hours a week and go to work but I have no friends to hang out with. I go to movies alone and coffee shops, but for the most part just hang out by myself.

i just join this forum i hope i get to meet sum folks here cause i feel lyk der is no1 in this world dt could evr relate to my issues. Depression takes major part in my life. Im also 20 but act like a 40 yr old cause i alwys hv tyme to listen to others but den no1 is eevr ready to listen to me. <br />
Hope we can be friends and share stories and get to kniow one another.

Yes of course we can! Message me

It makes me cry to read your comments. I feel less lonely now that im obviously not the only one out there. Im 19 yrs, female, college student. If any of you want to read my story,, here you go:<br />
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from age 6-18 : low confidence, broke my nose, isolation, hiding my face, It was awful. my childhood flew away before me. <br />
in high school: finally got my nosejob. confident again. but Misunderstood cause ppl thought i was one of those fake persons. no friends at all. isolation, eatingdisorder, family problems. low confidence.<br />
now in college: new chapter in my life, trying to forget about the past. still feeling lonely, crying alot. (by the way ive had 3 nosejobs so far). But now i have emotionalblocking. i dont know what love and care means. Im very cold on the inside, but faking an innocent smile on the outside just to survive in my new class. <br />
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i dont know what you must be thinking when reading my story. Maybe you dont understand. maybe you do. I've giving up on friendship, love, very close to give up on my family too. but my littlebrother keeps me going. yeah.. thats about it. take care.

Like you and loads of others I too experienced what you did. I worked all week and at the weekend had no one to go out with so I started going out with my mum and dad to bingo but i didn't tell anyone. I had a great time with them although I missed people my age. I even wrote to dating adverts but didn't get responses. It wasn't easy and my diary says how depressed and lonely I was however now I can laugh about it and look back with fondness. Just try and do daft things with your time which you wouldn't normally do !!

helo dear. i felt the same way when i was younger but later i realized that no one would ever like me if i kept on thinking negative about myself..you are very young..see your worth and people around you will eventually notice it..

I know how that feels I'm 18 and literally haven't had a WONDERFUL weekend yet..even prom was a nightmare and I had a ******* date. I feel so alone even though I have so many friends and I feel like I'm just waiting to die. Nothing feels right like I don't feel like anyone really cares about me or anything. I actually spend more time alone than I do with others because I always feel like the odd man out. No one understands me because I am so weird and even though it sucks and I whine I still have hope that it will get better and that there is someone out there willing to be my friend or even more who won't hurt me. So look towards that rainbow and wait cause it will work out for the both of us. :/

I'm the same only I'm 26, have a great career and amazing salary. But all my friends are married or in relationships and I'm obsessing about why I'm not married yet. My messages also get ignored and it just makes me want to curl up and die.<br />
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I see a psychologist once a week now, but it's all the same old crappy advice - get out there! Go do stuff! Really?? I can't go to church alone one more time, I can't go to the cinema alone and have people stare, I can't go clubbing alone or go on holiday alone.<br />
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If I had a gun, I would shoot myself as soon as I can. Done feeling self-loathing and guilt and awkwardness and self-pity.<br />
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You can't cultivate sudden positive thinking to make people like you. It's not that simple!!

I am also 20 years old and feel like nobody cares....my mom is always telling me that I should be ok and that she had a harder time than me in my childhood. My boyfriend is amazing and tells me that I am also amazing but it is hard to trust him because of my mom always expecting me to be perfect and to do everything she says. Just go out there and find some people like you to be friends with.

Its strange that so many feel the same but the outcasts in my school all went on to achieve a normal life but now I'm the outcast but it's only when one admits there's a problem that the healing can begin.And reading your comments is part of the healing. Thanks.

I've had depression ever since I was born. As long as I can remember I've had depression. I don't take medicine because I'm afriad it would make me go crazy. All my life I thought I just had to suck it up, and deal with it. But love is the best medicine. Its hard to find love when you feel lonley, my depression makes me alone, which is more difficult because I'm a romantic. I've learned that I was alone because either people were jelous of me, or intimidated because I'm very good looking. No one should be afraid of me, many times I just wish someone would say hello. And its a good idea to break the ice yourself, but thats hard because I felt like I would be disturbing them. So what to do now? I don't know, but everyone is worth something, and everyone is beautiful in one way or another. Sometimes that special person, who changes your life forever is just around the corner. I've learned just be yourself, and you will find that person.

Feeling lonely and sad can feel terrible and as you describe it like dead. There's nothing wrong with you for feeling this way. And having no one to hang out with doesn't mean you're not a wonderful person. For some reason you don't get invited. What it might mean is that others don't get to see that wonderful person that you are. This can happen because you're quiet, you don't tell others much about yourself, you don't show your interests, you rarely smile ... Does that ring a bell? If this does sound like you, you can change this. Make it into a little game. Tell something about yourself to someone you like and see how the other responds. Not getting invited is usually more about how you come across than about who you are. If there's someone in your life you can really trust and who has your best interest at heart, ask them for feedback on how you come across. That's how I learned the most.


Wow, how odd is Life! I'm married & have a huge family but in the mist of it all I too feel alone by myself & rejected. How cant his be?<br />
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You guys I' m sorry to have read your info & I just wanted to let you know we all go thru this, like I said I'm married & have been feeling this way, alone sad as if I'm an outcast. Why do I feel like this?<br />
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I pray for peace & strength & to meet others whom I can share with.know your not alone you have others out here whom do care even a stranger on a blog

Most social groups involve "pretending", pretending to be so many false things! People that have replied seem genuine and so do you, their motives transparent for all to see. Commonly the "plastic people" as I like to call them, view US as being boring and use demeaning words like "geek, nerd" etc. to put more genuine people down.<br />
Its not impossible to have a laugh and fun when you are "real", but you need to slowly make life changes where you meet like minded peeps!<br />
Leave the plastics, with their suntans and fake teeth. To talk rubbish all day and night in sugar coated "plastic world"! LMAO!!<br />
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PS. I am 45, so you can take my word for it! :-D

im 17 and my life is just like that

plz contact me i really alone riqht now

i am that person on friday nights alone!! i know how u feel, talk to me if u want!!!

Been there done that..... Here is the deal. There are others out there just like you who BELIEVE me would love to have you as a friend. You have to find them. They are at the gym, at church, at clubs (skiing, biking, book clubs), They are a discussion groups, volunteer groups (especially things like young democrats, young republicans, habitat for humanity, library and hospitals). They are at school -- classes about jewelry making, art, literature, history, yoga, guitar- non required classes. Signup for something to GET you out to find them. So many are JUST LIKE YOU.

Where do you live? I will be your friend. I feel the exact same way you do, everyday, I feel like I am a ghost, watching everyone around me have family and friends. I have no family or friends at all. I feel very sad all day everyday. It really sucks.

Hey i am 43 yrs old and always found it difficult to make friends and socialise right from my nursery days and throughout my school life. I never had anyone i could talk to and have always been extremely shy and never fitted in society that has led me to suffer severe depression,anxiety and ocd. Have attempted suicide twice. Anyway for the past year i got help with doing voluntary work in a charity shop two afternoons a week which is a big achievement to but not to other people. If you need to talk im here.

I think it's great that you're doing voluntary work and it's a big achievement being around people when you're shy and feel disconnected from others. I've never fitted in either and even posting here feels hard to do.

Hi' im in the same position. im 20 and in my final year at university now, and i havent made any close friends in the 2/3 years ive been here and i seem to have drifted from the friends i did have from back home. I got my boyfriend to talk to but apart from him i dont have many peop-le to talk to nowadays and its making me quite depressesd. If you need anyone to talk to, im here and i could do with the support as well :)

I get told by my doc i should go out have fun but when i ring around just even to ask for a cuppa with someone thay say there busy or thay ignor my msg this hurts so much its been 18mths now i sit on my own day and night i cry till it echos threw the apartments my doc put me on more antidepression that didnt help me im still alone i cant eat sleep i need a friend i used to work for the salvos for 8yrs ive always helped others out i love to do so but nobody is there for me i ache inside i feel like an emty shell

everyday i become even more stressed i feel so alone i dont have any friends i have no job no money i have no life im married to a person that i dont love i have 6 kids i wanna be a singer but dreams havent came true ive tried killing my self but it hasnt worked ive tried talking about my problems but no one understands i was sexully abused until i was 13teen i didnt have no one to turn to people think there life is hard somedays i dont even get out of bed i wish i could make my self forget the past but i cant !

I go thorugh deep, dark bouts of depression and I AM 29. I think i have a good head on my shoulders and an excelent support staff at home, It's miserable and seems like there is now what out. But there HAS to be. And if we keep relying on thoses around us, you will slowly find that passion for life you have had before. Good Luck. I'm here for you.<br />

Hi Sadgirl20,<br />
are girls the predominant people feeling sad and loneley, I am a 67 year old man and this depression and loneliness has been with me all my life. Sure I went to the pictures(fims)...by my self. I can realy identify with your feelins because even at 20 it was the same for me.<br />
I hope you can break the cycle before you get my age.Actualy I didn't know there was anyon as bad as me.<br />
Love Alkimos

i am sad and lonely all the time. i am always in a house full of people, but i am still very much alone. i am married mother of 2. married almost 20 years in october and my children are 19 and 20. they are my life. my husband is here. but that all it is, he is just here. we don't talk or do anything for that matter. i used to thing that was better than being alone. but now i am reallly not sure. i am so unhappy and desparately want to be happy if only for one minute. my children are here all the time but have their own lives. i really have no one i can really talk to freely. i just want to know that i am not alone in the way i feel. is the grass really greenier on the other side or is it the same old ****? i am not even sure i want to really know. i can't take much more of being disappointed. i know i am responsible for the way i feel. but how do i change it? how do i get out of this funk i am constantly in. i really just need to know is there really a such thing as being really happy?

I know EXACTLY how it feels. That is my life and I am only a teenager still in high school years...I have ALWAYS been lonely and alone without a true friend or family it's been like this since I was very little. I always felt and still feel that no one likes or thinks of me. I do not feel loved at all. Everytime I was bullied at school or had problems with anything I always had to solve them or deal with them all by myself without anyone reaching out a helping hand to me. Everyone passed by me laughing and being happy as if I was invisible. I cry out in loneliness all the time, I feel trapped in a dark place where there are shadows and no one can hear or see me and I can't get out no matter what. Right now I can't think of a person or place I can run to. But I never give up and keep going because...<br />
I BELIEVE THAT LOVE EXISTS, I'm pretty sure someone out there feels my pain and knows exactly the sorrow I'm going through. One day I will find someone to love and someone to love me, life is too short not to make the best of it. Always keep the faith because you will be loved.<br />
Peace out and take care everyone! ♥

my situation is also similar my friend...my family loves me, I have some good friends. but still I feel loneliness around me. I dont know what it is, but I always feel like I am missing something or lost something....I feel sorry for you. but I cant give any solution as i myself searching for one. but I can only say that I wish you will have many bright days ahead. I give you my best wishes..smile a while :-)

Like you I was sad and lonely, right through my growing years from infancy until I left school. I had no friends, everyone seemed to either hate or simply reject me and I was frequently bullied at school. I never even had a girlfried until I was 21. I hated every second and often prayed that God would just let me die.....but He didnt. At 18 I joined the regular army where I was the smallest and skinniest in my Platoon but I stuck at it while others fell by the wayside. After 24 years I was the only one left and I had achieved greater things than I could have ever imagined. How did I do it? My loneliness and isolation as a kid gave me the strength and determination to do whatever I had to do myself, as I knew that no-one else would ever help me. I am now totally self-confident and self-sufficient. I have no friends but many acquanitences. Some people out there hate me for who and what I am...as good as any and better than most....and others admire me because I can be relied upon to get any job done. <br />
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Right now this may not help you much because you are feeling low, but hang in there and you will be fine. You will come out at the other end as a confident, purposeful and strong individual who needs no-one, but who others will look up to and admire. <br />
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Believe me. Be strong and you will make it.

I am very similar.Being very quiet with no real friends throughout school,I was always picked on and never got asked out anywhere.Jump 20 years later,I haven't been able to make any lasting friendships at all but have learnt to like my own company and do things that I enjoy.I'm not happy all the time but try not to think about it.I look back on my life and wonder where it all went wrong?I can't see anything changing in the near future but there is always hope.I'm on this site hoping to meet similar people in similar situations looking for solutions.

Listen, dear. I understand you completely. When I was 20, I felt in this way. Later in life I learned one of the reasons I felt in this way. It is in a biological nature to start feeling in this way. Human beings (and other mammals too) have natural feeling of separation in period transaction from the "child" stage to "adult" stage. Just watch if you can documentaries about tigers and horses, wolves and many other animals. We humans are in the same way. At this age, we biologically becoming independent (subconsciously if you will). And we only have emotional connections to our parents. If the balanced and healthy, you will pass this period of time easier, than individuals who does not have balanced (very important) connections with their parents. <br />
So, what to do. Get busy. Keep in mind that it is YOURS life ahead of you. Don't wait the inspiration from your friends and relatives. Be inspiration for them. Start liking things: new books and movies, find (and drop them) new hobbies and interest in your life. Get into something and do it well. Cooking, rock claiming, baking, designing clothes, making photos,....whatever comes into your mind. People will love and appreciate you for whatever GOOD and well you will do. To get really good something, it will take couple years. By this time you will be handy creative individuals, and people will for YOURS friendship. Be kind to them than. Love, Understanding Individual.

I was like that all through high school and most of college. Then I noticed that there were other social outcast just like me. I met a guy, that was also a social outcast and we became good friends and ended up living together and getting married. Somewhere, someplace there is someone out there for you. Just do your best in school or work and let nature take its course.

Genetlover....articulate...please. That was just horrible trying to read that! Gave me a headache!

hi dear....please don't take it seriously.....everything is going on a right way.... be posetive and be confident on yourself......yaaaaaar....by and take care

you often go through those feelings at certain times in your life. I'm 32 and now goING THROUGH A TRANSITION WHERE LIFE GETS BUSY AND FRIENDS HAVING BABIES. SO IT'S NOT SO EASY TO CATCH UP ANYMORE. HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT TRAVELLING?MAYBE A CONTIKI TOUR WOULD BE GOOD TO WIDEN YOUR CIRCLE OF FRIENDS. When I was younger I worked a ski season,best time of my life and still friends with those people. CHEER UP AND SEE THIS TIME THROUGH :)

Hi, if you feel unhappy, pls contact me.<br />
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I like you , and i like making friends with you.<br />
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Best wishes!