I've been into erotic restraint all my life, though I rarely got to do it. The idea of a woman bound or tied up was always intensely exciting for me, and a few lovers let me try it and tie them up. It was terrific. But I never thought I was a dom, or into BDSM. To me, that stuff seemed kind of sick.
For one thing, I wasn't anything like most of the doms I read about. I wasn't especially arrogant, didn't think I was necessarily superior to women or deserved to be waited on by them. I didn't especially get off on giving orders, and I thought the idea of whipping someone was barbaric. I basically liked women and respected them. Liked them a lot, in fact. I just happened to enjoy tying them up for sex and using them as I liked. I liked the idea of pleasuring them at my leisure, exploring them, playing with them.
That all changed with W. I met her online and we talked for weeks. She was getting maried at the end of the summer, and she'd been fascinated with BDSM all her life and never gotten to try it. Her new hubby would never put up with it, andshe wanted to try it just once before it slipped away forever.
I flew down and she met me at the airport. We were old friends by now and we laughed ang gossiped as she drove to the motel. Once inside the room, though, I put down my bags and stood by the dresser. I told her to kneel, and she slowly got down on her knees, her eyes down. The air in the room seemed to grow thick with tension and desire. As per my instructions, she was wearing a skirt, garter belt, and stockings. No panties. I told her to spread her knees slightly, and then to slowly gather her skirt up her thighs.
It rose like a curtain going up, revealing the tops of her stockings, the black bands where the garters attached, and then the naked Flesh of her upper thighs.
I told her to raise it higher, to show me what was mine, and she did.
W was the first true submissive I'd ever been with, by which I mean, it excited her to be controlled and used, to be bound and renderd helpless. I'd played with other girls had gone along with it, but W got into it. What I did to her excited her, and her excitement excited me further, till we were locked in this dance of desire and arousal, going higher and higher to a place where the space between us seemed to dissolve and there was nothing but the two of us fused into one need. I'd never experienced anything like it. It wasn't only better than I'd thught it might be. It was better than I could have imagined.
Later on, when she asked me to use a whip on her, I didn't hesitate. I suddenly understood what the whip was for and why I had to do this, and I did it in a maelstrom of emotion, never losing control, playing her like she was a musical instrument and I was some sort of virtuoso. I knew exactly what she wanted and exactly how to give it her. It had never ocurred to me you could use a whip that way. Suddenly it all made sense.
There was a downside to all this. I fell in love with her, and had to go down twice more to see her. There was no question about her abandoning her plans to marry though, and our last meeting was heart-rending.
But there was never any doubt in my mind after that that I was a dominant. I might not be like other doms, but I don't give a damn about that. I do what works for me, and for me, BDSM is an ex