Just ExploringToday, I explored or tried to explore (on my terms) what turns me on or off about diapers. This is quite hard for me to do since I am a natural sub and I usually ba
First I explored the feeling of the cath, there was a prickle of pleasure as the cath entered and travelled up my pee hole, but nothing overly exciting. The sudden rush of pee was rather enjoyable, but no fireworks of pleasure. It was a turn on to insert the cath, but nothing I couldn't have achieved with a toy or two. Once the cath was in, I could feel very little, so that couldn't be it. Maybe the pleasure comes from my earlier forced experiences with a cath being put in place. I am still not sure. Once the cath was in place, I did feel a release of world pressures, I was not being good. I was engaging in sexual activities that society as a whole doesn't approve of, something of this maybe excited me. Or could it be giving over control of this function to my body rather than my brain?
Second, I decided to try something I had not willingly done before. I have read several stories about the rush some get from wetting. With the cath in place this was the best test of what uncontrollably peeing myself felt like. So for an hour or more I went about my daily activities in nothing more than a too big men's undershirt on. As I did my hair, pee ran down my legs onto the bathroom floor. I would need to clean that up later. The pee was free to run down my legs, and since the house is relatively cool I definitely felt it. It is something I would like to explore more, I think. Part of me wonders what it would have been like to have someone watching me, would I have been able to continue to free pee if there was someone there? I made sure to drink plenty to get the full effect. It was an interesting feeling to have pee trickly down my legs, warm and wet. I noticed that there was a slow but almost nearly constant dribble coming from the end of the cath. I found even with the cath in, I could almost tell when I was about to have a bigger dribble and I would have a few seconds to get a non carpeted area. It was such a different feeling I decided to do the dishes this way. I had all ready scrubbed the bathroom floor (very hard to do with the constant flow running every where) what was one more? I noticed that if my legs were slightly apart I was more aware of the wet flow. But if my legs were roughly shoulder with apart, I noticed my lack of control much less. I have to say I wasn't quite prepared for the bigger surge of pee when I started to do the dishes, but it was without a prickle of enjoyment of this odd feeling of a loss of control. So I went about my work doing the dishes as I slowly wet the floor. I had gone back into my room to get a towel when I heard the sounds of people coming home. I quickly shut my bedroom door and reached for some pajama bottoms.